barely survived an ah fun's injury prone day..

juz got back from the 2d1n teambuilding we had in JB. overall it was fun other then the fact that i suffered alot of injuries and my whole body was aching. damn suay. shall update on that slightly later when i get some pics from chummy.

had a few drinks with ftee and tg juz after gettin back into s'pore. nic joined us after she was done with work. decided not to drink anymore as we were all exhausted. went for a quick dinner at qiji and headed back home. after i got home, dunno y but i had weird thoughts over something. its not like i drank alot and i felt pretty awake, i was merely physically drained.

decided to go for a walk to clear my head. i realised i can almost think along the frequency of a person who's suicidal but its not like i am suicidal. but its scary. my personal life hasnt been all that great recently. maybe thats y i've been having these crazy thoughts. i imagine abt things that i know will nv happen but it appears seemingly real like as if it juz might happen.. this is totally not doing me any good. im afraid i might juz blurt out these crazy thoughts of mine which will totally upset my norm lifestyle.. to begin with do i even lead a norm lifestyle? with all that said, pls dun come asking me wad i was thinkin abt. like chummy says 'if i tell u, i'd have to kill u' and i dun wish to be a murderer so pls dun ask me..

'first time I looked in ur eyes I knew, there was something special inside of you
you awaken my passion and my curiousity
you were so sincere I knew you'd be there for me

you gave me joy that I never knew
you were sent here to love me cuz I needed you
you helped me get through the worst times in my life

you shared my sadness, my pain, my stride
whenever I dream the impossible dreams
you assured me that they would come true
you stayed in my corner no matter what life could bring
and I pledge my love to u

just like the rain falling to the ground
you washed away my frowns and turned my life around
you made everything good in my life that was bad
you're the greatest friend that I ever had
I want you to be right here beside me forever and a day

for you are my strength, you are my future
and I need you here to stay

what.. what can I give you
in return for the hope that you've given me
just ask and, whatever you want it will be, it will be

you are the piece of the puzzle I need
to make my life full length complete
I love you so and thanks for being my best friend..'

something to ponder on.. do you have such friends? hmmmms...

dun think i ever wanna celebrate my birthday again. no dinners, no cakes and most importantly no singing of the bday song! *faints*

and so i thought i could escape the whole birthday celebration thingy, boy was i wrong. met my whole family yday to go pay respects to my late grandpa, he passed away a few days after me bday. then my aunt planned to go dinner at some chinese restaurant at thomson plaza thereafter. i thought everyone forgot abt my bday, i was so so wrong. i felt loved but at the same time, i wished they had forgotten abt it. i wasnt up to the whole celebration thingy, juz wanted quiet and peaceful one.

luckily i had another not so close aunt who's bday was a few days earlier than mine and so i had someone to go thru all the embarrassing moments with. *phew* shall talk abt that slightly later. the food at the restaurant was pretty good but there were a few hiccups here and there, i was feeling nice then like as if i had a halo above my head therefore i didnt kick up a big fuss. there were a few things i was quite
impressed with tho.. there was this steamed prawn dish and they actually offered to de-shell it. at first i thought i heard wrongly but my cousins sitting next to me were like 'did u juz hear wad i did, like de-shell the prawns?' haha and de-shell it they did! very quickly and nicely... the heads of the prawns were still fully attached!!



and then came a venison dish.. it was yummy and i was again impressed with the presentation of the dish...




and then the dinner ended... and my aunt bought a cake. like awwww man. so we had to go thru all the rites of singing the birthday song and me being totally embarrassed cuz everyone in the restaurant was like staring. i really felt like hiding under the table. well for all that embarrassment i got quite a few red packets so i shan't complain. it was a fair exchange? haha.

wala's again..

so i left off yday sayin i had to zip off to wala's. met a friend there lucky we made it in time to get a decent table and seats. its crazy the band starts at ard 10 and by 9 all the seats are taken up and if u cant find seats my advice wld be juz to leave and find somewhere else unless u can survive standing for the rest of the night. another thing is the time they end their 1 for 1 is at 9 maybe thats y the bloody crowd packs in early.. duhhhHh.

so i had my usual 2 rounds of hoegaarden. i juz wish they have the big 750ml bottles back soon. its much more worth it then drinkin the 330ml bottles now. bleh! jill suggested to have wings and i was like cool since i havent had it in a long time. but we had a difficult time finishin it off. therefore im impressed with ah ho cuz she can wipe out the wings.. *pukes*

skinny chummy dropped by with her moley guy friend. haha :P lucky i was guarding the 2 extra stools i had. haha. kept telling her not to go st james cuz she's been there almost every wk i think for abt a month already although she says its only been 2 wks. tsk. then they ordered another portion of wings which made me sick even by looking at it. ohh ohh another thing chummy and i kept thinkin back abt that 1 time smally chummy was with us at wala's. think that was the fun-nest time we had at wala's. cuz there was ah ho, her friend (which skinny chummy brought up yday and we realised we didnt rem her name, hee.. sorry!), skinny and smally chummy, taxi door and myself. hope we can do it sometime again!

oh darn its back to work tmr... *sigh* dread the work but am looking forward to see smally chummy... missed her on friday. wonder if she has stuff to update me on for friday cuz i wasnt at work? hmmmms....

moving on from mid to late twenties... *groans*

so here i am past a quarter of a century old.. have nothing to my name nor a career to boast about. this totally sucks. am i being struck by the mid-life crisis? when u realised u've been in this world for so fricking long yet u have yet to acheive anything? actually i dun really care... let me juz lead my life a day at a time.

so moving on.... oh i mentioned in my previous entry that i'd talk abt the pressies i rcvd. chummy skinny & smally, aw, tg, al & crabbie shared to get me a new wallet. cuz chummy smally asked me wad i wanted and i told her i needed a new wallet. my old money clippy wallet was dying on me. so she said that they cant afford a mont blanc becuz over budget which i was totally cool abt it. as long as they dun get me some funny-lookin, odd-coloured wallet. ended up they got me a mont blanc!!! then i was askin chummy smally isnt it over budget then she said she'd top up the rest! *sniffs* so touched. then norain sprung me a surprise too. i came back from a site inspection and found a box of chocs on my table with a lil note from norain and she came by shortly after to gimme a big hug! so sweet right??! then grace and michelle presented me with another $150 mont blanc vchr cuz i told them i wanted a name card holder. haha now i will have a full range of mont blanc stuff. wallet, namecard holder, key pouch and a pen but in an ugly green. cant complain tho. heh



got back from batam this morning. had a good massage there, it felt so good. fell asleep while tanning and jumped up when the heat finally got to me and now my face+nose hurts like hell. it was like my most interesting trip to batam. made 2 new friends while i was there. we got to know the f&b mgr who used to work in sg and we made friends with a fellow diner while having dinner by the teppanyaki grill.. we were like the only patrons there cuz it was like the rest of the ppl stayin in the hotel decided to have buffet and it was very noisy. we had to waste some money to eat teppanyaki to get away from the crowd. think the dinner check muz've came up to abt $200 cuz we had quite alot of warm sake. ended up this new friend we made insisted he settle the bill for us. he's a damn interesting guy. born in sg, studied in us, living in hkg but works all over the place. he's into shippin, marine engin so happened that he docked his ship for repairs in batam. he left us his namecard and mobile number so that if we ever go to hkg we can give him a call and he'd bring us ard. so nice right? but we shld nv be so trusting towards ppl...



ok thats abt all i need to get ready for wala's.... cheerios!

this was supposed to be yday's blog entry

on our way back from work last night in chummy's car last night she was saying she'd be blogging abt one of our sales ppl whom during morning meeting pronounced warner brothers as warner blooders. hahaha. i almost wanted to die and chummy thought she was the only one who realised it when there i was hard trying hard to contain my laughter and not burst out laughin like an idiot.

then i told chums i wld blog abt another colleague that we have who's a fortune teller??! she knows the future...! when she reads the morning reports instead of reading it as last night's figures or last night's no shows she reads it as the present day's figures! and mind u she has been corrected before.... and to think she's a SSM... dear dear me. fake bitch.

so yday i rcvd a rare call.. from emily. she ordered me to go ktv with the rest of the FO ppl. feelin ok i decided to go.. think it was a bad move. stayed on till ard 5. had abit to drink and found out something abt my buddy that left me abit disappointed. felt that the situation cld be handled a lil better? but oh wells.. its not fair to pass judgement like that cuz when u're caught in a situation like that urself u'd not be able to think very well too. -shrugs- hope she gets past this in the nicest way possible and also to all the parties involved.

and so i woke up late even tho nick gave me a wuc on time cuz i went back to sleep. got up at like 845 and i was like oh shit! then i started puking and had abit of diarrhoea, felt weak and wobbly all over yet i still decided to go to work cuz i had alot of work left off from the day before. didnt manage to do much but didnt wanna take mc also cuz kept feeling its only a few more hrs to endure... boy was i wrong. it was damn painful waitin till 640. left on the dot! and here i am back home blogging. alrights i shall head off to bed. really have alot of work to finish up tmr.... gd nights to all....

shall blog abt the 1st bday pressie i rcvd this yr in my next entry..........~<|:o)

that used to be my playground..

was chatting with ah yin earlier this afternoon sometime after lunch.. cuz i was feeling sleepy and didnt wanna work too hard on a monday cuz theres still like 4 long days to go before the workweek ends. BAH! its a bloody torturous cycle...

anyways as i was saying i was chattin with ah yin and she was apologising to me for having abruptly ending a conversation we were having the night before cuz she was at work and needed to log off to prepare for the electricity shut off, they call it something like high tension shut down? some crap that they do every now and then to test that all our backup resources are intact juz in case something really happens. then we started reminiscing abt the old times.....

how it used to be so fun going thru all those crap with our buddies. it really makes alot of difference working with the ppl u like and get along with. and so ah yin was saying she remembered the previous time she was on night shift on high tension shut down together with nick.. i remember i was also ever on midnight once on hi tension but i cant remember who i was working with, muz've been someone who didnt matter much! ha. but well i remember those times when i was on shift and fidelio was like down for the whole morning.. i was on shift with jasper and both of us had to redo all our checkout transactions which was like a whole fricking drawer full. and also there was once we had waitboxes all the way till like 9pm. that was my longest morning shift, it ended at ard 11pm. that was when shimin was still ard and jean herself was monitoring the rm situation.

that was all good fun. its sad that such history will never repeat itself. i muz say all that groomed us into the talented ppl that we all are now! the present kiddos have a long way to go before they'd ever be like us. *evil grin* lol

oh another thing.. chummy was being irritating today. bleh! last thursday while we were at suntec walkin ard after lunch i told her i felt like buying a 'lil piggy' to munch on. u know those lil cute thangs in a plastic basket that they sell during mid-autumn festival? she refused to lemme buy it cuz i was already munchin on a pretzel and having my honey green pearl tea. she went to buy like 6 'BIG PIGGIES' during the weekend and she refused to let me share it with anyone else. its like punishment to me for being greedy?! all i wanted was a lil bit of my childhood.. *sniffs* and the worst thing is the big piggies didnt even come in the cute baskets, that was the whole point of eating that fuckin piece of flour?! and now i still have like 4 big piggies to go...... *groans*

but chummy no matter how u torture me.. im still glad for having u ard. sounds abit sadist eh? but really, i dunno wad i'd be without u ard. i need uuuuuuuuuu.. to answer my silly qns abt work, to send me home after work!, to have lunch and fetch water tog with me, to listen to me sing all the weird songs that ppl dun normally sing(n u actually know the songs too!), to pek zao with, to listen to me ngam ngam cham cham only to have me rebutt u that u gg yy and most importantly to slap my back to my senses when i lose track of where im headin towards... thank u. i love u. *muah!*

and it comes tumbling down..

ever had the feeling that everything seems to be finally moving on fine for you? after so long.. after all the shit u had been put thru. its like u finally get to see the sunshine after braving the rain... but all thats not meant to be. u juz need 1 little setback to bring u back to where u started off from. when others say life is very fragile im beginning to think that happiness is very fragile too. theres only a very thin line that seperates happiness from sadness. and with that 1 little setback i've been kicked back into the region of sadness and darkness.

chummy u are right. i didnt need that person back in my life. it was a mistake to even let that person creep back into my life. and so now im suffering the repercussions of my dumbness. this time i really want out... and nothing more to do with that person...

and here i am again building up my new defences and having to work towards being happy... its sucha chore.

"How do I, say goodbye, to what we had?
The good times that made us laugh, always come back,
I thought we'd get, to see forever,
But forever's gone away,"

Good riddance i might say?

guest appearance...

headed back to wala's again yday.. its like a weekly affair thingy. but i really prefer sitting down having a few drinks and a live band to keep u entertained rather than going clubbing... feel im too old for clubbing. it makes my body ache a whole lot for the next few days and it leaves my ears buzzing for the next day which is highly irritating.

and i had the company of 2 girls.. 1 of which that has disappeared for like the longest time. it was nice meeting her again. =) im gonna post a pic of them which i took last night even tho i know 1 of them will come after my blood cuz she looks white in the pic... aiya its juz the flash and cuz u have make up on but bear doesnt :P




well... hope we'd have many more outings of such before bear disappears again? cheerios!

soon to be smoke free?

its been 2 days since i last took a puff. think its been easier this time as compared to all my previous attempts, its not really considered as attempts because i really did stop smoking for quite some time before succumbing back into the habit again. i remember clearly i used to suffer from horrible withdrawal symptoms like runny nose, watery eyes, feeling lousy the whole day and every little thing that went wrong would make me 'snap' and was just easily irritated. now i suffer from none of those but instead i have alot of craving for different kinds of food and im perpetually looking for stuff to snack on. abit like how pregnant woman behave? although im not quite sure cuz i havent really been through pregnancy??

u all muz be thinking y i've suddenly decided to quit smoking? honestly im not quite sure myself i juz thought its about time i stopped or i'd never get down to doing it? i find it amazing myself that im finally beginning to think straight? haha. it really takes massive amt of determination in not succumbing to temptation. picking up a ciggie is really easy but try having a ciggie put in front of u and not having to pick it up... its like HELL.

so now the plan is to quit smoking altogether. and smally chummy stop smoking in front of me, its abt time u quit too! dun gimme the crap abt quitting next yr! *faints* after i stop smoking and which by then i'd have put on hell lotta weight becuz of the snacking, i will need to start planning a regular exercise regime. that is of course provided if i keep to it! well if i can quit smoking i dont see y i cant be determined to lose all the excess baggage! pls wish me luck..

check this song and mtv out..

梁汉文 + 杨千嬅 - 滚

i really like this song and mtv.. hope that u all are able to view it... today was rather uninteresting cept we 3 chummies finally met up to have lunch together. then there was some drama cuz we bumped into someone we were hoping not to bump into becuz i had to lieeeee to get her out of the way so that the 3 of us chummies cld enjoy lunch together-gether. oh wells.. then chummy #1 and i came up with names for each other... its skinny+funny+smally. go guess who's who. lol. left work slightly later than usual becuz TC made me stay to do something and i was NOT to go home until i had it completed. hmpf! but we still made it in time to koufu to satisfy chummy #2's craving for ban mian. had a long wait for cab to go home.. ended up calling all the nonsense cab operators until we got one. and i was like feeling tired. tsk tsk.. so much for efficient public transportation in s'pore. when u need it most it fails on u. *spits*

lazy days...

its been quite a few days since i got down to blogging. wkends now are purely for drinking, chilling and staying out till late which explains y i nv have the time to blog about my interesting wkends? haha like real. ok lets backtrack abit... i think i left off from last thursday? i shall start from thursday anyway cuz i cant think back any further than that!

THursday
went to MOS with nickers and ah yin. there were 2 others who were supposed to go but somehow didnt turn up. well its alright, had silly fun with these 2 buddies of mine. had a couple of weird incidents too but i shan't touch on that.

FRiday
after like 2hrs of rest, headed off to work. was pretty ok and alive until i had to go outdoors for a couple of sales calls. think the oh-so-hot weather killed me. went back to the office and started to malfunction shortly after. chummy warned me big big time not to go clubbing the night before if i had to work the next day cuz she says im not gettin any younger, think she's afraid i might juz drop dead and die?? lol so after work we went to our fav n most convenient watering-hole, paul's. quite a turn out only missing my other chums. even mr gopal came! wld have been more fun if i was more 'alive'... haha

SAturday
decided to go for a haircut before going to meet chums for dinner. aye it took so darn long, thats the thing abt being off on wkends like everyone else... sighs. dropped chums a msg to tell her i might be slightly late cuz i was at the hairdresser's and she replied 'no worries but you really didnt have to get your hair set just for this date..' i was laughing so hard i nearly died and everyone ard me thought i was CRAZY. oh wells thats my chums and thats y i love her so much, so full of shit. had dinner at food republic in wisma then headed over to emerald hill no. 5 cuz chums was supposed to do some mystery shopping for her friend for their services. got kinda bored so we headed back down to wala wala's...

SUnday
had lunch with m at taka's coffeeclub. its been awhile since i last went there. had my regular ceasar salad with rosemary chicken. tasted as good as before maybe even better? booked tickets to watch no reservations at cine. i like that show. its a no-brainer and kinda predictable but i personally feel its a rather suitable movie to catch on a wkend when u dont really feel like reading too much into the plots and stuff? and its the lovey dovey awwwwwwww kinda movie that one will definitely like! after the movie shopped ard abit and can u all believe it, i actually thought of helmi while i was in G2000 gazing at an array of neckties. reminded me of helmi and how i didnt quite like his tie at work :P so i decided to buy him ties! got m to pick out a few ties and i narrowed it down to the 2 i finally chose. but of cuz i didnt get them from G2000 cuz its kinda pricey. hee. anyways helmi... hope u like them and u muz really wear them hor!!!!!! or i'll boycott u too at work!!

"unlimited power"?

didnt work today and almost the whole sales team has to go down to expo to attend some 'motivational cum inspirational' talk by the 'world-famous' anthony robbins, stephen pierce and allan pease. given normal circumstances i wld be very happy if i didnt have to work but it was sucha torture keeping myself awake and fighting the hunger for most part of the seminar that i really thought i'd be better off at work. oh btw thankfully chummy was driving or it'd be sucha hassle travelling there!

the talk started off with allan pease, i think of all the 3 speakers he was the only one who made sense. analysed alot on human behaviour and such. pretty interesting. his part went on for abt 2hrs before we headed off for like a 20mins break. everything ard was so crowded we decided to stay put and luckily for me i rushed out in the morning to buy some rations to tide us over.

next up was anthony robbins himself. he's huge... as in like really bigggg sized. and he was so full of crap. dont understand y everyone felt so entertained. i felt awkward like as if we were in some cheesy church congregation. reminded me of the times when i used to patronise this church that alot of youths go to and 1 of the pastors ended up becoming a pop star.. *shudders* it wasnt too gd an experience for me. similarties between the two... 1) in church we'd always raise our hands and say 'hallelujah', in this seminar he made everyone raise they hands and say 'aye'. 2) in a charismatic church they always make u stand and sing along and wave ur hands ard frantically, in this seminar same lor keep makin us stand and jump and hop and wriggle to the music. 3) in church the pastor wld say the sinners' prayer and we'd repeat after him, in this seminar he made us chant some dumb verse after him over and over again, i thought they sounded like some cult! this guy spoke for abt 3.5hrs before we breaked for lunch. and again we didnt bother to go out to get anything cuz there were too many ppl ard. got AW to da bao nasi lemak from qiji. it was like the most satisfying nasi lemak i had ever had.

the last part came stephen pierce... this guy was the WORST of the 3. intolerably boring! he's like a multi-millionaire.. and so thats wad he says.. he was trying to like 'teach' us his methods to earn money over the internet. being an IT idiot if i cld close my ears im sure they'd auto fold inwards and juz not listen to him at all. gosh... he was so boring we left half way thru to go to the john little sale juz 2 halls away from us and i spent like $50+ buying toiletries and munchies. haha. we tahan until abt 6pm and by then more then a good half of the people had already left. and so this pierce guy started his sales pitch and, all askin ppl to buy his stuff. he was like selling a membership card for $9,887 and some package for $47,587!!!! thats ALOT of money dude... but im quite sure there muz have been crazy or ppl who r too rich who took them up. geeeeee... and so we left shortly after. whole day wasted juz like that. i left there, still uninspired/unmotivated/unimpressed.. or issit juz me?? i'll nv wanna go to such things again.. dun understd how come the rest of the people there seemed so enthusiastic and they all looked like they left as better people? hmmmms...

we left expo ard 630 and headed to bedok for 'bar chor mee' woooohooooo.. its been awhile since i last had that, if chummy didnt mention abt it i'd nv have thought of goin there. heh we had bar chor mee, carrot cake and chicken wings for dinner. YUMMY! i muz thank chummy for bringing me ard today and entertaining me during my most boring hour... hahahaaaaaaaaa

i cant believe i missed blogging abt last friday..

i was juz reading chummy's blog then realised that i totally missed out mentioning abt friday... haha. anyways we left work rather early considering i still had alot left to do. well there's always monday to complete it. i cant really be bothered anymore. met up with an ex-colleague whom its a pity i didnt get to work under her. the other chum's was supposed to come too but oh wells she cldnt make it. ah dot came along too. she's damn funny lo. she can be the script-writer, director and actress all at the same time. full of crap.

and so we were gossiping over our beers at paulaner's as usual. its like a weekly affair thingy. and all our gossip mainly revolved ard 1 person, she must've been sneezing her nose off. :x great way to chill out. chummy can we like do this every week, can u cheat taxidoor into signing a permanent agreement? heehee

moving on to today.. didnt do much. woke up and glued myself to the telly to catch up on the drama serial on forensic stuff cuz they rerun the whole wk's episodes on sundays. after that i glued myself to the computer. felt fat so decided to go for a jog.. i actually got down to doing it, cant believe it! went for an hr but out of that hr half the time i was walkin cuz i was so FRICKING breathless. best part all those ppl who walked past me and were smoking... wa lao i wanted to rob them off their cigs. but i supposed it was due to smoking which contributed to my breathlessness. i need to exercise MORE, smoke less and eventually QUIT and eat alot LESSER! im contemplating to take up a gym membership again but i dun want history to repeat itself. once upon a time i ever joined and paid them mthly subscription for a yr but within that yr i patronised them less than 10times. haha. if i dun go its a bloody waste of money. better think carefully... again it boils down to how determined i am in losing weight before i burst and die from obesity........ *tsk*

Have a listen to this..

梁漢文 楊千嬅 - 滾
quite like this song.. very dramatic, juz like how life is.. wanted to post the youtube mtv video but keep gettin error msgs... *tsk*

i shld think it was an eventful saturday?

made plans to meet up with her today. its been awhile. went for a massage.. it felt sooo good. after that we headed to lido for expensive japanese food. felt i had abit to spend becuz of the backpay increment. after that rushed over to taka to buy myself a new pair of trackies using the taka vchrs i had. not too bad la only had to top up $20 for a pair of reeboks. rushed back to lido to catch ratatouille. it was pretty good. i thought the rat looked cute?! but there were hell lotta kids in the cinema. every now and then some kid wld burst out crying... irritating.

after the movie had to once again rush to marina square for granny's 84th bday dinner, we parted ways at MS. it was good food again at some under-rated chinese restaurant. had some good wines too cuz my uncle brought them along. i didnt even know that restaurant existed.

after dinner, took a cab down to club street to meet her for drinks again. only to find that the place was infested with a whole big bunch of irritating ppl. had a jug of vodka ribena and decided to scoot off to somewhere else. ended up at balaclava cuz she wanted to go there. they have a very sucky variety of beer, even worse than wala's! they dun even have kilkenny or hoe by bottle! ended up drinkin 3 pints of carlsberg until i felt like puking. i dun really enjoy carlsberg. and the bill came up to quite abit! *tsk* didnt stay for long cuz they close at like 1. shared a cab back with her then broke down in the cab... *sighs* i dunno at times i really pity her but like wad can i do? and i dun even know if i wanna do anything or not. my life is pretty ok the way it is. yes, my job may suck or be stressful but at least its a decent job and he feeds me well enough. i may be single but its better to be stuck in a relationship im not really happy with or know ultimately its not gonna head anywhere. i have a couple of chummies and pals that i can count on for company. wad more can i complain? we shld all learn to be contented with wad we have... its a tall task but if we can see things in sucha way, life wld be so much nicer....