cant cry hard enough..

i think my good friend who's named insomnia is here to stay with me.. through thick and thin. after countless bots of hoes' and resorting to puffing cigs outside my rm's window with the door closed, im mentally drained and physically strained yet im still not sleepy. its almost 3am and it doesnt help with sucha song playing.. and its true when i say 'my sanity hangs by a thread' and may i add its a very thin thread... God save my soul..

I'm gonna live my life
Like every day's the last
Without a simple good-bye
It all goes by so fast

And now that you're gone
I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

I'm gonna open my eyes
And see for the first time
I've let go of few like
A child letting go of his kite

There it goes up in the sky
There it goes beyond the clouds
For no reason why
I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

I'm gonna look back in vain
And see you standing there
When all that remains
Is just an empty chair

And now that you're gone
I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

There it goes, up in the sky
There it goes, beyond the clouds
For no reason why
I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

been a busy wk at work..

realised i haven't had the time to log on at home to blog. looking back i used to do it so often. its amazing where i found the strength to log on after a long and sucky day at work and to blog abt it. oh wells.... lemme summarize my wk at work..... hmms.....

then again for the past wk i've been busy mainly because of the dumb artiste group. took up hell lot of my time to sort out their ever-so-often changes, so damn troublesome coordination with the various departments(and it didnt help that some particular dept was damn bloody UNHELPFUL), ever-demanding organisers where everyone gives different instructions and the best part of all they're all bloody cheapos-with low budgets and paying lousy rates. makes me wonder why i have to work so hard?!

decided to drop all my work yday so that i cld head to the FO chalet with the few nice ppl who bothered to wait awhile for me to finish up with my work. still dunno whether it was a gd or bad move for me to go but it doesnt matter anymore cuz the fact is that i went. felt quite out of place but it was still nice seeing all the buddies who braved countless storms with me in the past. those were the gd old days. im very happy for those who have moved on and i pray for those who havent that their day will come soon. left the chalet with a heavy heart that was filled with regret and guilt but i shan't elaborate on that..

in the past week i found out a piece of news that was kinda disheartening for me. i dont understand y there muz be politics at work and why i have to be subjected to it. dont understand why some ppl can be so evil? i dont believe i've done anything towards u. i did my part and served my purpose. why is it u have to always stick up like a sore thumb when things goes against u? honestly, at ur level u shld learn how to be more forgiving and learn how to let go when u have to. u're sucha sad bitch, pls get a life.

today's the longest Saturday ever i spent at work ever since i transferred to sales. yea it had to be the dumbass artiste group. to all those fans, i honestly dont understd wads all the commotion abt? they're all juz humans, except they may be slightly better lookin than the normal chaps u see on the streets? if i didnt remember wrongly i nv did idolise anyone in sucha way. thank goodness. if i ever had kids like that who'd spend unneccesarily to like charter a maxi cab to follow the idols ard or book a rm at like a few hundred bucks, i'd hit the living daylights outta them! and to think i had to be a human barricade.. some dumb girl was actually pushing me from behind and started screaming, i already had this horrible frickin pondin headache and i was like abt to like punch the next person who irritated me. so i turned ard and stared DAMN hard at her, thats when she moved back and stopped screaming. *sigh* teenage girls.. plain irritating. stayed ard till 10+pm.. now im with my bot of hoe, listening to sappy oldies mp3s.. all im missing is a ciggie. *sighhhhHHhhhhHhhhhhh*