I love humanity but I hate people..

its been a really long time......

2011-04-28T13:52:00.002+08:00

been awfully long since i last blogged. not sure if i wanna revive it actually and if i do whether i still wanna do it on this same page. while in the midst of deciding i thought i'd change the template abit.. not really sure of how to do things around here anymore.

so much has changed ever since i last blogged. i dont mind my job. im still stuck with the same teaching one. wanna make a change on that but again im stuck at the crossroads of not really knowing what to do. *sigh* why is it that some ppl seem to have so much passion and conviction in what they wanna do and yet poor me here is totally clueless on that?

anyways i'm really supposed to be like marking test scripts instead of even trying to blog and so farewell.. till we meet again.. here or someone else.. now and in the near future.. we shall see..

*i wonder if anyone still even reads my page.. im thinking no. haha

i'm cute???!!

2010-04-17T20:30:00.004+08:00

ok teaching is starting to be slightly more enjoyable even though my timetable sucks. back to back lessons in different classrooms, many days i even have to compromise on my lunch cuz i have days where i have lessons from 9-2, 8-1, 10-3. its been tough running around and school has only just reopened for a week and i'm feeling thrashed and that i need another holiday away from sg. oh wells...

anyways y i say teaching has become slightly more enjoyable is because i'm now teaching subjects that i'm familiar with and furthermore i was the one who did up the notes and all so it means i do not have to study before my students!! i also have added responsibilities now that i have a form class of 37 students. thank goodness so far they've been good. and i know for a fact they can be good its juz a matter of how long they can remain being good. in comparison to the other 2 new classes i can proudly say my students are more outspoken and fun. suits my character eh! i shall groom them to be all like me although i'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing. hahahahahahahaaaaaa.. well the good thing now is im beginning to enjoy what i'm doing! fweeeeeeeee... i hope this feeling stays around! i'm on a roll................... :D

From some survey done by the students during the recent holidays..

Open comments on the Teacher

-She is an easy-going teacher. =)

-a good teacher.

-she is easy to communicate with and fun loving, and she is able to understand the students well.

-very out-going teacher. :)

-ms fun!! haha.. during ur lesson i'm always enjoying myself learning as well. sorry when i sleep during ur lesson :q

some fb comments that i picked up from the senior buncha students that i've only just begun to start teaching this term. makes me feel good knowing that they enjoy my lessons and they like me! ooooooh!!!! hee hee...

cant believe its been so long..

2010-03-29T20:59:00.002+08:00

whoa juz realised its been like 8mths since i last blogged? i think we've all kinda grew out of blogging... ha. not sure if anyone's still occassionally checking out each other's blogs every now and then?

so much has happened since the aug that i dont know where to start from. i guess the biggest change i've gone thru is the switch in career. i dont even know what i got myself into now is even called a career cuz the path seems to kinda die at where i currently am now. dont think theres much progression where i am. i dont regret having moved to do what im doing now, i've learnt life is too short for regrets and it hasnt been a totally horrific experience but im thinkin i might have prematurely gone into a retirement job. lol. well i guess i still have time to ponder about where to go from here, for now i'll juz stick to what im doing to gain experience and we'll see where that brings me to.. hopefully somewhere huh!

that aside life has been pretty fun with all the diving that i've been doing. im glad i took that up! though its pricey to sustain but its really awesome. aim to do rescue diver within this year. not sure if i'll take up divemaster becuz im really juz lookin at doing tis for recreation n not as a job prospect. furthermore dm's in sg hardly earn anything maybe cept for couple of free dive trips to the nearby areas if they lead a dive but thats too much responsibility for me! hahahaha

so other than all the above i think i need to save many many much much $$ to do more travelling also. top on the list is hkg!! seems so near yet so far.. *sigh* need to be able to take leave also. thats a toughie.. wad a bitch!

till we meet again.... toodles.

=updates=

2009-08-01T12:17:00.002+08:00

so its been about 4mths since i last blogged. in the last 4mths i've done on 3 different diving trip and i have another 1 planned to redang this mth! hopefully the trip goes as planned. it has just been so amazing, do hope my finances can keep up with my enthusiasm. lol. been holding back to buy the equipment becuz i wasnt sure if i was gonna keep to this hobby but i think i'm ready to get abit of my own stuff now.

diving aside it has only been work and nothing much else to talk abt. work has still be horrid and i dont see how it will improve anytime soon. the amount of stress from the bosses, the management, the owners, the clients, my targets and goals.. its juz massive and i feel like i can hardly breathe. so many constraints yet the bosses think its ur business to straighten it out and they're only interested in seeing results and receiving good news, all others u are to absorb and buffer to ensure it doesnt get to them. sighh.... i need some balance but i dont know how to get it. well thats something for me to ponder about yea? for all those out there.. i know u're suffering too. a word of advice or rather something i practice... take things with a pinch of salt, dont get worked up, the more u get worked up the more the other party is one step closer to succeeding, theres only so much u can do-do whatever is within your means leave the rest to the others, listen more-talk less... lastly remember to breathe...

peace out.

new hobby... diving.

2009-04-05T14:00:00.003+08:00

hey all i know its been a long time since i last blogged... to the extent that i had to crack my brains and try to remember wads the password to log on to the blog! haha.. i dont even know if anyone still checks my blog out... ayee doesnt really matter, i write to entertain myself anyways. ---> trying to make myself feel better, while obviously knowing the fact that im kinda writing to myself. lol

anyways.. nothing exciting has really happened all these months cept for the recent diving trip i went for. after much hesitation (yes, i've been wanting to pick up diving like since damn long ago) i finally got down to doing it. together with joey (the last time we planned didnt work out) michelle and the last unexpected join to the group... sarah. winnie dropped out becuz of unforseen circumstances--> i realise ppl love to use this excuse, i think its crap btw! so we decided on goin to pulau dayang cuz it was the cheapest compared to tioman and redang and being a learning trip where half the time u'd be panicking and not concentrating on what there is to see, we thought it was the wisest choice. so off we went on the last wkend of March. the rest is all history... its amazing underwater. the peace and tranquility.. and sights and serenity.. its juz puts u at peace seeing all the fishes swim by u... its juz so fucking amazing. juz only a wk after we are like about to plan for the next dive. the only downfall of this hobby is that it costs alot. but im not complaining, at least its a healthy hobby? ha well i urge all those who had always planned to pick up diving to really get down to doing it. its something u wont regret. :)

cheerios~

long overdue post..

2008-12-14T03:18:00.004+08:00

i've been away for like so long im not sure wad to update anymore. in this absence i've gotten 2 more tattoos and many more other stuff, that some are not worth mentioning and others are for ya'll to find out.. ha.

caught the sneak preview of twilight today. slightly disappointed cuz was kinda expecting more but overall its still watchable. i've seen much worse movies. well there'll be a sequal to it.. cuz it ends with .......... ya i dont like such endings. tsk. went to orchard today and its one of those days u bump into hell lotta ppl? saw liah, lee sun sun, allyssa, jean kor.. is sg small or wad?? wanted to do xmas shoppin but didnt end up buying much. shall try again tmr after brunch. am lookin forward to it! to see me crabbie and chummy.. hope i dun get sleepy and lazy after brunch becuz there really isnt very much time left to do shopping! grrrrrr...

work has been ever so tiring.. with the implementation of a dumb new operating system. i've analysed and come to the conclusion that the only few reasons why we have been put through so much nonsense is because....
1) HI is being stingy and refuses to pay licence rights to use the good old operating system we were running on.
2) HI came up with this PMS to create high-paying jobs for the whole HUGE team who 'assists' to implement it.
3) HI came up with this PMS to force us to work like how all other dumb H properties function. 4) the gardener bribed them to make the program work towards her benefit (when it comes to the inflexibility of quoting rates).
5) HI is trying to prove their stupidity when they managed to come up with a dumb PMS but is unable to come up with a catering system to go along with it, and when asked why so.. the reason is becuz due to the downturn of the economy the catering management system project has been stalled till further notice.. so now we have to do double work! WA LA! how efficient! **refer to point 2.. maybe if we didnt have sucha huge implementation team who draw huge salaries we might have had some funds left to create the catering system?!

in short... the dumbasses are out to kill us! *spits* die u bastards! DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me!

Motherfucker!

Urggh!

~Killing in the name, Rage against the machine~

meaningless conversation?

2008-11-09T22:35:00.005+08:00

someone had a craving for roti prata so i suggested cheese prata at pasir panjang.. which she 'cleverly' linked it to being near pasir ris.. lol. maybe cuz both places had pasir in it? so it can also mean pasir panjang is near bukit panjang which is in turn near bukit timah? woohoo! hahahahahahahaaaaaa had a damn bloody good laugh! :P in the end also didnt make it to eat any prata... hiaks.

watched the coffin and saw v over this weekend... kinda disappointing. the coffin wasnt half as scary i thought it'd be and im not exactly a saw fan so yea, not much plot to begin with. so they ended it off in sucha way there'd still be saw vi... still think REC is the best i've watched in a long time.. y'all should go catch it if u havent!

sigh so sad the weekend has come to an end already. it'd be a long long week ahead. so not lookin forward to it........................ good night.. at least i get to do something i like before i have to go to work again. sleep... i hope i wake up a happy, chirpy person!

'Day after day I must face a world of strangers

Where I don't belong, I'm not that strong

It's nice to know that there's someone I can turn to

Who will always care, you're always there

When there's no getting over that rainbow

When my smallest of dreams won't come true

I can take all the madness the world has to give

But I won't last a day without you

Touch me and I end up singing

Troubles seem to up and disappear

You touch me with the love you're bringing

I can't really lose when you're near

If all my friends have forgotten half their promises

They're not unkind, just hard to find

One look at you and I know that I could learn to live

Without the rest, I found the best..'

when u and i collide..

2008-10-26T21:52:00.002+08:00

my friend... dont assume u can read me like a book. when i let my defences down becuz u are a close friend and let u into my life is doesnt mean what u see is all there is to me..

i'm sorry i didn't read the signs and collided head on with u.. into something i never foresee was going to happen in the next hundred years.

i'm sorry u felt i've let u down when to begin with i knew shit abt what the heck was going on. i only realised recently only to find out i've already been deemed a liar when i had absolutely no intention of lying at all.

question is, am i even sorry? or am i juz being nice? i cld choose to confront u which im holding back cuz knowing me... it might turn out ugly, which is something i dont want cuz u are.. afterall.. a good friend. seriously, would u prefer to thrash this out? i dont want any of us to come out being bitter and all...

now i dunno how to close this chapter.. as much as u dunno how to. as much as she doesnt know how to. lets juz all hang then. till we find a solution if theres even one?

"If I am

Only here to watch you as you suffer,

I will let you down...

The answers we find,

Are never what we had in mind.

So we make it up as we go along...

You don't talk of dreams

I won't mention tomorrow.

And we won't make those promises that we can't keep..."

lazing & drinking my days away..

2008-10-19T11:48:00.002+08:00

past few days haven't had much to do so i've caught up on abit of telly... i was watchin "Who's line is it anyway" i used to love that show. damn fricking hilarious! suddenly a thought came across my mind its like sucha simple pleasure in life yet i dont get to enjoy simple things like that? i seriously dont want my life to go on the way it is for the past year. its been too long, too much to take and its slowly eating me inside.

i wanna move on, i have to move on. then again life is always about wanting something but not being able to get it? now i got myself stuck in something i dunno how to get myself out of or do i even wanna get myself outta it? u see.... me life stinks.

so glad im on leave for 1 day tmr... at least i can avoid the monday blues. u all will not understand how precious juz goin on ONE day leave means to me. laze laze laze laze laze.......... let me hope and pray that nobody from the office or clients calls me tmr.... *rolls eyes*

hello.. its been a bloody long time.

2008-10-14T00:53:00.004+08:00

yes trust me i know its been like a month since i got down to blogging.. there has been so many instances whereby i mention "i will definitely blog this down!" but yea knowing me i never quite got down to doing and once the moment passes, my memory fails me. ha like whats new?

time is never on my side. tell me i have bad time management skills but i seriously dont think the problem lies with me? why can't i go through a simple day like how others do.. a day where i can say "ok, time to go home cuz i've finished my work." i can never relate to that becuz my work is neverending.. i never go through a day feeling like i've accomplished enough and done all i am required to.. is this the way it has to be? alright enough of my endless grumbling...

moving on.....

the past week has been a queer one. my emotions are hard to decipher and even harder to control? shan't elaborate any further till i substantiate what im feeling?

"This ain't a movie no

No fairy tale conclusion ya'll

It gets more confusing everyday

Sometimes it's heaven sent

Then we head back to hell again

I hang up you call

We rise and we fall

And we feel like just walking away

As our love advances

We take second chances

Though it's not a fantasy

I still want you to stay

Take it slow

Maybe we'll live and learn

Maybe we'll crash and burn

Maybe you'll stay, maybe you'll leave,

maybe you'll return

Maybe another fight

Maybe we won't survive

But maybe we'll grow

We never know"

hello bello...

2008-09-06T16:21:00.002+08:00

a brain fucking moment while chatting with belle...

[aђ fﻥй]™ says:
theres nothin much to watch on the movies
[aђ fﻥй]™ says:
except alot of local shit
BeLLe @ Work says:
true.. hahaha.. but i'm kinda in a movie mood
BeLLe @ Work says:
what show are u showing?
[aђ fﻥй]™ says:
har
BeLLe @ Work says:
har?
[aђ fﻥй]™ says:
wad show am i showing
[aђ fﻥй]™ says:
i dun show shows
[aђ fﻥй]™ says:
wtf u talking abt
BeLLe @ Work says:
hahahhaha
BeLLe @ Work says:
sorry laaaa
BeLLe @ Work says:
i'm sleepy

its been long while..

2008-08-31T22:06:00.002+08:00

haven't had the time or patience to get down to blogging which explains my absence of almost a month away from here... work is sucking the life out of me. its juz terrible. am still wondering why i work so hard for? again it always boils down to the stinking thing called responsibility i have instilled in me. something that ppl nowadays lack of. my word of advice for ppl who just started out fresh into the workforce. be humble, work alot-talk very little and do not complain becuz u have not earned the fucking right to. damn it..

last friday was a day which i did not know to be happy or sad about. it was the departure of my best friend from work.. my chummy which evolved from just a colleague from another department to my boss to my confidante and really a very very good friend. i'll miss the days we've spent together at work. and of cos everyone has been asking wad'll happen to me after u leave, i seriously do not know. i'll never be able to find another 'partner' like u.. but that aside, im really happy that u made it out of the dumps that we're still stuck in. i really wish u well and that we'd still be in constant contact even after u've left ok?

"How do I say goodbye to what we had?
The good times that made us laugh
Outweigh the bad.

I thought we'd get to see forever
But forever's gone away
It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday.

I don't know where this road
Is going to lead
All I know is where we've been
And what we've been through.

If we get to see tomorrow
I hope it's worth all the wait
It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday.

And I'll take with me the memories
To be my sunshine after the rain
It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday."

It's So Hard To Say Goodbye To Yesterday - Boyz II Men

another lazy sunday..

2008-08-04T01:02:00.002+08:00

had great plans to spend the day with jilly but she came down with a bad tummyache... poor kiddo. hope she's feeling better now. u better get well soon... i still owe u a jap buffet dinner for your bday. in actual fact i have craving for sashimi. hahahaaaaaa

ended up meeting tg for coffee at starbucks and talking crap. i actually miss the times when the millenia starbucks had outside seating and we used to spend most of our days there after work talking nonsense, smoking and juz chilling out after a hard day's work. at that time starbucks was like my poison, something i cldnt get past a day without. oh wells it might not be a bad thing that they moved into the mall, think that move saved me ALOT of money.

after coffee went on to watch the mummy.. the seats at grand cathay suck. i didnt mean the location of the seats becuz we booked the tix so that was fine. i meant like everytime the person next to u moves u can feel it. it was damn annoying and it actually made me dizzy. the movie was ok.. action-packed. the kinda no brainer show suitable for viewing on a sunday. although it was weird how they switched in between english and mandarin. i mean i know its supposed to be as such becuz the title is like "THE MUMMY: TOMB OF THE DRAGON EMPEROR".. but to see michelle yeoh speak mandarin (not fantastic) in the beginning and then nearing the end she began to speak in fluent english.. and i was thinking to myself they had english classes back then cuz she's like immortal? wah seh she took the time to upgrade herself in her 2,000+ years... got herself english-educated. hahahahahaaaaaaa but still it was enjoyable to watch la.. =)

ok now im so dreading to go back to work in a few hours time... got tons of deadlines to meet, many already passed the due dates. sigh i feel like im so gonna die. everyday is like a struggle at work and i can only attribute it to 1 a**hole.. seriously, u're a f***ing pain in the a**.. u should really get a life and perhaps get a job which suits ur competence and capability.. which u know the match of such a job is zilch.... and like u say "watch out, what comes around goes around" may this befall on u too... burn........

National Day Parade Preview 020808

2008-08-03T17:28:00.003+08:00

The overhyped-up highlight of the whole parade.... dig in! its almost 2 minutes long!

been another bad week..

2008-07-07T02:05:00.003+08:00

"Not from the stars do I my judgment pluck;
And yet me thinks I have astronomy,
But not to tell of good or evil luck,
Of plagues, of dearths, or seasons' quality;
Nor can I fortune to brief minutes tell,
Pointing to each his thunder, rain and wind,
Or say with princes if it shall go well,
By oft predict that I in heaven find:
But from thine eyes my knowledge I derive,
And, constant stars, in them I read such art
As truth and beauty shall together thrive,
If from thyself to store thou wouldst convert;
Or else of thee this I prognosticate:
Thy end is truth's and beauty's doom and date."

[aђ fﻥй]™ says:
i needed a massage so i called my friend and then we ended up goin for a massage then we got hungry after that so we had a big meal, we felt fat after that so we went swimmin and we felt damn awake after that so we went for a movie.. ---> that was how i spent my sunday. wad a nice summary..

am getting lazy to blog... till next time, im bothered. ciaos......

i've got happy feet!

2008-06-29T23:04:00.010+08:00

i brought my new digicam to work on Friday and took some pictures in the office with the 2 silly girls.. created a collage of some of the better pics. ha. and then they decided to announce something that should have been effected long ago but its really nothing to shout about. and so we got our incentive bonus for last year.. oh wells its really better then nothing so we shouldn't be complaining about the amount at all? i mean so many people have come and gone without it so we should be happy that we are the very first batch who actually sticked around to collect it?! ha

had to cancel the JB trip becuz wendy's relative passed away and she wasn't gonna be at work. gave wala a miss cuz i didn't feel like i was up to shirlyn's rock n roll stuff. ended up having a drink with jillie at the brewerkz in kallang and then after that to watch "21" at cine. gee the only seats they had left were 2nd from the front. i felt like my neck and back was gonna snap somewhere in btwn the movie and it was so frickin cold! practically turned into an ice cube.. bbbrRrRrr! and the show was really draggy, boring. jill, we shld have juz watched deception instead but the shitheads didnt have the poster up on the 5th floor so we didn't know what show it was! *spits*

and becuz of the 2nd row seats we felt that we had to pamper ourselves today so we made an appointment to go do foot reflexology. and then jill suggested to go for the dr fish thingy at the flyer, to let the fish feed on our feet. sounds sick. damn fricking ticklish! its a once in a lifetime thing. both of us deduced that after trying this fish therapy thingy and the flyer we prob wont go back there for a 2nd time? and then we also realised we shouldn't go back to the fish thingy cuz why should we be paying them to feed their fish??! hello we were the phish food so they should be paying us?! haha took some pics...

maciam tiger beer lady... this is jillie trying to promote the 30mins fish therapy + 10mins shoulder massage at $78!

jillie's foot

my foot!

my feet being phish food

we were bored while waiting to be phish food

yea... me being spastic as always!

so after being phish food for 30mins we needed to feed ourselves and we ended up at glutton's bay.. had chix wings, stingray, hokkien mee.. the usual i have when i go there. and then we went over to marina sq to get me my green tea ice cream! mmMmmmmm.. i think its addictive. dammitz. and its not cheap lo $3.80 for a single scoop. bleh! ok so thats me sunday well spent with jillie.. now we're sulking abt having to go work in a few hours time. *sigh*

im hoping it gets betta..

2008-06-22T16:57:00.002+08:00

am trying to recuperate from a very bad week at work. im upset with everyone and i really dont see why i should be the one caught in between yet still the stinking responsibility in me forbids me to juz up and walk away... well i hope its over.

went to watch the happening on friday after work. duh show but mark wahlberg is cute as always.

sat i was supposed to go to work but ah wong called and disuaded me to go and i think it kinda worked cuz i ended up at kenko and signed up for a 12 session massage package and i ended up using 2 sessions at 1 go. went to work to sort out abit of stuff and pack up my desk becuz of some dumbass vip coming on tues.. like we really care right? ended up at wala of course and we had val with us.. but half the time she was fighting to stay away. she was tearing as if her bf juz dumped her or something and i was like stop it la before ppl ard us think im the one who dumped u! hahaha

now im preparing to go out to meet ah yin to watch another movie.. i think sg is so fucking boring.. i really dont wanna die here! dunno wad show also... the adam sandler one? luckily im driving kor's car else i think i'd be too lazy to go anywhere lo. im beginning to think im bored without mummy ard cuz on sundays she'd normally settle my meals. and im very hungry now.. thats the only reason why i got up at 4pm else i think i can sleep thru the whole day if i didnt have a stomach...?

sucky week..

2008-06-15T19:49:00.002+08:00

had a long sucky week at work and the upcoming one should be just the same. because of the 1 sucky event im handling. cant wait for it to be over.

nothing much to blog about cuz its all been nothing but work. i need a break soon before i snap. im thinking whether i shld juz go check out the websites when i have more time, book an air ticket to some unexpected destination, get my leave approved, fix my accommodation then just pack up and leave? i might just do that... fweeeee

oh i went to the PC fair at Suntec yesterday. u all must be thinking im crazy right cuz im normally not the kinda person to go squeeze with like half of the sg population just to get a slightly better deal? well i happened to be at work yesterday and chums was also there so i went ahead lo since i wanted to get a new digicam. so i ended up buying a cam which was over my budget.. when i ever have the time to finally fix it up i suppose it'll mean u guys will see more pictures posted on my blog?

oh yah i went to wala too.. left work at ard a lil past 8 and of course we cldn't get any seats so we were standing for a good 2 sets. geeee... i cldnt feel my legs after that. and then my bestie had to leave me with her friend when i didnt feel like entertaining lo. luckily bello was ard. muahahaha.. bestie, pls hor next time wanna leave someone or something to me make sure its someone better looking or something more valuable?!!! hahahahahaaaaaaa oh oh oh... and shirlyn walked past us and smiled and waved at us but dumbie belle didnt realise. she was so cute la! fweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

the weekend gone just with a blink of the eye....

2008-06-08T22:35:00.003+08:00

this weekend passed me by wayyyyyyy too quickly. lemme recap on the whole string of not so many events...

friday
went to dinner after work... went home shortly after. felt sleepy (1st time in a very long while i felt sleepy at 11pm!) and sickly, popped a cold panadol and a muscle relaxant and went to bed. woke up the next day at 4pm?!

saturday
was supposed to JB with "birdy" but it was pouring.. really heavily so we called it off. i dragged myself outta bed ard 5pm cuz i was starving. met up with tg, may, tee and ed for steamboat dinner. kinda enjoyable cuz of the weather. was gonna catch SATC at a lil past midnight. had alot of time to waste so we went for a beer. i love SATC! enjoyed every single bit of it.

sunday
got up and met belle.. she accompanied me to have my messy hair fixed. went to a new hairdresser today. not too bad, pretty inexpensive too. i might juz use her from now on.. jason irritates me la. he always makes me wait way too long for a sucky hair cut. ha. but i like him.. he's damn funny.. still.. he's not worth the time and distance for me to travel to go visit him!! did some shoppin and bought some stuff while waitin to catch kung fu panda. i thought it was funny but belle didnt find it funny. oh wells. i like jack black. he's cool. oh and we bumped into taxidoor and von who were gonna watch SATC so we ended up meeting for dinner at glutton's bay. it was an ok dinner.. chums, i agree that it wasnt as satisfying. i wonder why though? ok now its dreadful having to think that i have to be back at work in abt 9hrs time! *hyperventilates and passes out* maybe then i wldn't have to go to work? ha... nice try. bleaH!

a short story i came up with... enjoy!

there came a new boss named Bobby.. who was really only a white dog in disguise.

and Bobby had a defiant subordinate called Sue Lyn aka the Ultimate Bitch..

Moral of the story: Bobby should really stay out of Sue Lyn's way cuz she really doesn't give two hoots about him cuz he is afterall only the 2nd in command and... a white dog in disguise. period. *scratch ass*

*lol im mad... the pre monday jitters getting to me! wahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa

take me away..

2008-06-04T02:19:00.004+08:00

this time what I want is you

there is no one else

who can take your place

this time you burn me with your eyes

you see past all the lies

you take it all away

I've seen it all

and it's never enough

it keeps leaving me needing you

take me away

I've got nothing left to say

just take me away

I try to make my way to you

but still I feel so lost

I don't know what else I can do

I've seen it all

and it's never enough

it keeps leaving me needing you

take me away

I've got nothing left to say

just take me away

don't give up on me yet

don't forget who I am

I know I'm not there yet

but don't let me stay here alone

this time what I want is you

there is no one else

who can take your place

I've seen enough

and it's never enough

it keeps leaving me needing you

~Lifehouse, take me away..

tat sat with allyssa g/kat p, m9 sunday brunch & click five sunday

2008-06-02T01:28:00.004+08:00

think the title already says it all. haha. well, allyssa g has been bugging me to bring her to do a tattoo and we finally got down to doing it yday. gosh the traffic into JB was horrendous. we ended up walkin in from the woodlands check point. check out her tat pics on FB (cant seem to post any pics here). she ended up doing 2! had fun with wendy also.. pui, now we know we cant go out with girly girls or we'd be bored to death! haha. had to give wala a miss because by the time we got back into sg it was ard 10+pm already.

got up early today (earlier then i normally do on the usual sundays) because i had a date with the girls, auntie irene/chummy von/crabbie reggie for sunday champagne brunch at M9. had good food and company, what more can i ask for? except for a huge check... darn expensive brunch. headed home for a rest and found zachy poo poo at my place. mum had to babysit cuz me bro had something on. spent some time messing ard with that lil cutie.

then... jilly came over and chauffered me to the indoor stadium to watch click five. the return transportation came with the free tix. it was a package deal that jilly offered me in exchange for my 'great almighty' company. even supper came complimentary. hahaha. its the first concert i've been to without knowing a frickin single song by the performer. didnt know wad the heck they were singing, totally unentertaining. i would have won an award if only they gave out one to the most unresponsive attendee of the concert. wahahahahaha.. i was so gonna fall asleep, i was looking ard at weird fans more then the stage. that was how bored i was. jilly... pls still bring me to concerts in future. i promise i'll learn the songs of the performers before i go with u! hee hee

Heal me, i'm heartsick

I'm hungry and i'm broken

I'm haunted, and weeping

The blood of heaven flowing like a river tonite, tears i can't fight on my own

I'm a haunted, heaving, i'm hung and barely breathing

The drowning ocean, snuff the sun in motion.

Theres a pill on my tongue, a shot from a gun , the bottles bottom

I'm lonely as a star

~No Vacancy - Heal me, I'm heartsick

wedding bells are ringing..

2008-05-25T16:53:00.005+08:00

cw and lou finally got hitched.. it wasn't easy i heard but im glad they pulled thru it. here's to wishing them all the best. here's some pics we took. we're really a spastic bunch. LOL.

the couple with the cute lil girls

the bodyguards to the mini cooper.

the bride and i

the ever-spastic bride

the crazy bunch

me with wendy's big dumb glasses

that's wendy!

ok now to talk about the whole experience. the church part was abit duh. not that the church wasn't nice or anything but the pastor/priest.. or whatever u call him in catholic terms was really queer. he was slurring and half the time he didn't quite know what he was talking about or maybe it was just me that couldn't understand him? but i refuse to think the fault lies with me even though i was surviving on like 3hrs of sleep. ha. it looked disorganised, or rather he was the disorganised one?

then we proceeded to grand hyatt for the lunch reception. it was the same function room charlene had her wedding dinner at too. Sir Stamford Room. i didnt quite like that room. it looked old but yea its grand hyatt what do u expect? the food was nothing to shout about too. the service however i must say has improved. sorry for being such a critic. thats what working in a hotel does to u..

so anyways cw & lou hired some wedding planners to run the show for them. guess it takes alot of hassle away from both of them cuz they're both busy people. there was this wedding singer.. they sounded ok, did some up tempo songs not the boring stuff couples normally like to use. so anyways i was telling the rest IF I EVER get married i'd hire shirlyn and the unxpected to perform.. and yes my 'hop-in' instead of march in will still be to Fatboy Slim's, Rockefeller Skank . hahahahahahaaaa

angels or devils?

2008-05-21T01:35:00.003+08:00

this is the last time
that I'm ever gonna come here tonight
this is the last time - I will fall
into a place that fails us all - inside

I can see the pain in you
I can see the love in you
but fighting all the demons will take time
it will take time
the angels they burn inside for us
are we ever
are we ever gonna learn to fly
the devils they burn inside of us
are we ever gonna come back down
come around
I'm always gonna worry about the things that could make us cold

this is the last time
that I'm ever gonna give in tonight
are there angels or devils crawling here?
I just want to know what blurs and what is clear - to see
still I can see the pain in you
and I can see the love in you
and fighting all the demons will take time
it will take time

the angels they burn inside for us
are we ever
are we ever gonna learn to fly
the devils they burn inside of us
are we ever gonna come back down - come around
I'm always gonna worry about the things that could break us

if I was to give in - give it up
- and then
take a breath - make it deep
cause it might be the last one you get
be the last one that could make us cold
you know that they could make us cold
I'm always gonna worry about the things that could make us cold

~Dishwalla, angels or devils.

today was probably the first time i've seen boss throw her temper. never seen her so upset before. it scares me.. scares me alot. i didn't mean for things to end up like that but i guess its about payback time. i've had enough of bitching and i seriously want to end it once and for all. im not asking for him to back down. i will... if only she'd allow me to. *sighs

another emo moment

2008-05-19T15:08:00.004+08:00

couldn't sleep last night and not wanting to waste the night away cuz i wasn't gonna be working today i went out to catch 2 late night or rather early morning movies. watched 'made of honor' and 'what happens in las vegas'. yea no-brainers are good for that time of the day.

i kinda liked made of honor. patrick demsey is rather cute.. but its very fairy tale-ish i felt. i mean like how it always end happily ever after when life in fact is hardly ever the case? but still being the sucker that i am i still teared during the scene where tom managed to win hannah over juz when she was about to exchange vows with an ugly scottish guy in the chapel. ha. it was another emo moment where i felt how nice it was for him to finally get something that he had wanted so much. i mean how many times do such things actually happen? especially of such big significance? dah.. i dunno..

what happens in las vegas was damn boring.. it couldn't even keep me awake. gee.. yea nothing much to say about that show cept maybe cameron diaz looks really old and ashton kucher.. urms doesn't look very good? ha

well i think i've been drinking way too much these couple of weeks. yesterday for the first time i was afraid of the smell of beer when i opened a can of kil and i ended up only taking a few sips but i dont suppose this fear will last for long. i resolve to die of either lung cancer or liver failure? ha...

Hold up

Hold on

Don't be scared

You'll never change what's been and gone

May your smile

Shine on

Don't be scared

Your destiny may keep you warm

Cos all of the stars

Are fading away

Just try not to worry

You'll see them some day

Take what you need

And be on your way

And stop crying your heart out

Get up

Come on

Why're you scared?

You'll never change

What's been and gone

~Oasis, Stop crying your heart out

where did it all go wrong?

2008-05-15T23:36:00.003+08:00

But I hope you know that it won't let go

It sticks around with you until the day you die

And I hope you know that it's touch and go

I hope the tears don't stain the world that waits outside.

Where did it all go wrong?

~Oasis, where did it all go wrong?

another zombie-fied day at work..

2008-05-15T00:26:00.003+08:00

so i couldn't sleep last night.. was chattin on msn till like 2 and i decided to log off when everyone left me to go to bed.. i ended up taking a walk around my estate while taking a few puffs. had a good scolding from my mum when i got back cuz apparently she heard me leaving the house and decided to get up and wait for me to get home to give me a tongue-lashing. bah. anyways i only managed to get like 2hrs of sleep and i was really malfunctioning at work. and today was one of those days i felt my boss treats me a like a slave. dammits.

the walk made me realise i have so much on my mind. some are senseless, some are worthless and some are juz not worth mentioning.

i hope i havent been scaring u these couple of days. i meant what i said and i'd never do anything to sabotage the kinda bond we've built up all this time. i'd not ask for anything more. i can't? i won't la... :D

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core
But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

This is not what I intended
I always swore to you i'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed
But I have loved you from the start
Ohhhh
But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
It's impossible
So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in
I'm yours to keep
And hold onto your words
Cuz talk is cheap
And remember me tonight
When you're asleep
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
Tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I wont live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

-always had this song but never really paid attention to it till ked asked me abt it the other day
~Secondhand Serenade, Fall For You

my train of thoughts.. think the train might be derailing?

2008-05-14T01:31:00.002+08:00

i've been getting funny ideas in my head. super random and weird ones.. stuff that has absolutely no relation to whatever i might be doing there and then. am i losing it? might be... these couple of days have been wayyyyyyy too exciting for me. wonder how much more my weak heart can take?

Look at us baby, up all night
Tearing our love apart
Aren't we the same two people who live
through years in the dark?
Ahh...Every time I try to walk away
Something makes me turn around and stay
And I can't tell you why

When we get crazy,it just ain't to right,
(try to keep you head, little girl)
Girl, I get lonely, too
You don't have to worry
Just hold on tight
(don't get caught in your little world)'
Cause I love you
Nothing's wrong as far as I can see
We make it harder than it has to be
and I can't tell you why
no, baby, I can't tell you why
I can't tell you why
No, no, baby, I can't tell you why
I can't tell you why
I can't tell you why

~Eagles, I can't tell you why

got a new tat..

2008-05-12T01:51:00.009+08:00

had an urge last week to get another tattoo but the urge came too late on a sunday for me to satisfy so i postponed it to this sunday instead. so off we went, ked and i to visit wendy in JB. went there with no idea what kinda tattoo i wanted. i juz wanted something in black, maybe a symbol, maybe a sign? and this was what i ended up with... like wendy said 'eh did u realise that what u tattooed wasn't what u asked for?' hahaha

then we went for dinner shortly after getting the tattoo done. oh in between ked and i went shopping and we bought some stuff. i bought a pair of chucks and a tee and ked got a tee and a cap. we had bak kut teh at some roadside stall but it wasnt really good. and now ked and i are grumbling over msn that we're hungry. haha

had a long walk back cuz the queues for the bus were insanely LONG. so we walked from jb customs --> woodlands checkpoint --> woodlands central and from there took a bus to woodlands mrt. and poor me was struggling to walk back from buona vista mrt to home cuz the ankle started to hurt. i think i took like 20mins to get back when normally it takes less than 10mins?

ohhhh lets backtrack a lil... i was at wala wala... yet again. last night with keddy and may. it was my 1st encounter that they didnt allow more ppl to go upstairs because it was overcrowded but like may said it cld be because i always get there early so i dont see it happening? quite true. so you ling came along awhile later and she was wearing the same coloured top as shirlyn. they both looked like zebras.. haha. ling and her friend were really entertaining. stupid ling made me go over and bluff her friend to drink in the end i had to finish my own drink and theirs too. they were juz pushing the jug around.. really doing injustice to the alcohol and i cldn't take it any further so i decided to wipe out the whole jug. okok i was juz being like how an alcoholic behaves! lol.. i had good fun with those 3... we shall do it again some other time.. =D

frustration sets in

2008-05-10T15:27:00.004+08:00

its been a rough week at work.. especially after the very sickening revenue meeting i had to sit in on thursday. i felt humiliated but i guess i could walk out and laugh about it. i feel like injustice has set upon me. i still dont understand why i have to tolerate all this. someone please give me a reason?? enlighten me.. or do i need to sit under the bodhi tree to meditate to finally achieve nirvana?

"When you get to this, then thoughts become still without being stilled, calmness and insight arise without being produced, the mind appears without being revealed. To try to liken it to the body of cosmic space or the light of a thousand suns would be to be further away than the sky is from the earth. "

"If you believe you are enlightened, you are actually a little bit crazy."

i think i believe in the latter more then the former. i have come back to the question again of how much more can i tolerate? its juz not worth all the heartache and frustations...

its getting harder and harder to breathe..

2008-05-04T22:47:00.004+08:00

sorry i havent updated my blog ever since i got back from Japan but i wld suppose that those who know me well enough to know that i even have a blog wld have heard that it wasn't a very enjoyable trip. oh wells... if i ever get down to uploading the pics or getting it from my cousins and post it up somewhere i'll let u all know yea?

so moving on, the title of this blog is as such becuz i am coming down with a cold. the very day i went back to work i became sick. its either i havent quite accustomed myself back to the sucky sg weather or im simply juz allergic to work. the 1st day back at work was bad... as usual. assholes not covering my work well but i've grumbled way too much on that so i shan't start again. it was so bad i had to spend like half a good day at work yesterday, on a sat. which totally sucks. -sigh- well at least my sat ended on a good note cuz i was at wala. =D

juz came back from watching 'over her dead body' at lido and the cinema was in a really bad state. shaw honestly needs to do some major revamp to the place man. i felt like i was in some eng wah cinema in like clementi 10yrs ago.. and in ked's terms 'yea there were even mosquitos there!' hahahaha those were the days. then there were like some malays (2 girls and a guy) ked thought they looked like indonesians tho, there were like chatting all the fricking way in malay. it get so annoyed that i had to turn around and go 'do u mind not talking?!' and they still continued... until i turned again and gave them the killer stare that they decided to shut up. i was at this point if they were still gonna open their gaps i was gonna drag them out and go like THERE U GO, U CAN CHAT HERE IF U WANT! but that wld take way too much effort to carry out. haha so anyways the show was really cheesy but light-hearted.. we decided we didnt wanna watch something too tensing on the brain on a sunday. heh. i tot eva longoria looked pretty good.

after the show we went to lau pa sat to satisfy my craving for sting ray. yummy. i suddenly miss all those times after afternoon shift where we went suppering all over. now i feel so suaku cuz i hardly have time to go out after work on wkdays. -sulks- and even back then with all the good suppers i wasnt as fat as i am now. like what the heck is happening to me....

im leaving on a jet plane but i know when i'll be back again.. ha

2008-04-22T23:49:00.002+08:00

so i'll be setting off to tokyo in like 6hrs time. frantically trying to pack wadever i need now and hopefully i dont leave anything out. anyways i shld be fine, im always the light traveller and i only bring along and require the most basic necessities. :) im excited about the trip becuz its been quite awhile since i went so far for so long? yea the trips i've been making these few couple of years have always been for like max 5 days and doesn't require a flight of more than 4hrs? yea thereabouts... but im not excited abt my old cousin going along.. bleh, i dont even wanna go into that now.

skinny chums called me this evening to tell me the US trip is off for her cuz she doesnt think its worth it to go alone cuz she'll need to rent a car to get around and for her to pay alone... its costly. oh wells.. i will still try to work it out with my aunt when i see her in JPN, maybe she might be kind enough to fly me to US and lemme sponge off her. afterall im like her only niece that hasn't visited her in hawaii yet. well if that really doesnt work out then i hope UK will welcome me. -_-

okies a few words before i leave... as if im going away for damn long.

- smally chums aka my gf.. dont miss me too much k? i know its gonna be painful without me around to 'assist' you at work but you'll always be in my thoughts k! *muaks* and i'll remember that taxidoor told me not to worry and that i dont have to get anything for u 2! yaY... hahaha

- my other specs fanatic aka bestie.. don't miss me! i know u won't.. piece of crap! and u actually tried to ask me to go to wala this sat, i was so close to kicking u luckily we were only chattin off msn! tsk tsk..

- ah yin.. i'll bring u some munchies back cuz u bgt me that you-all-think-its-sweet-but-i-don't-think-it-is candy back for me from turkey! hee

- beLLo.. i hope u're fine, sorry i havent had much time to chat with u and im kinda shocked to hear the news last evening. i promise i'll meet up with u when i get back and then we can talk k? *hugs*

- my lil mozzitoe moo.. don't miss my presence off msn cuz thats the closest u get anyways? heh. i'll webbie u when i get back k? *smacks*

i dont know who else reads my blog.. if i missed u out.. u know u wun get anything from me! hahahahahahaaaaaa i dont plan to buy much anyways so dont hope for too much k? :P

i'll be back sooooooooooooooooooooooooonnn... toooooo soooooooooooooooooooooon! peace out!

'we will rock you!'

2008-04-21T01:11:00.005+08:00

Just came back from watching the Queen musical 'we will rock you', it was so damn good. MiG was wayyyyyyy cool. we were at the very last row of the fricking huge auditorium but the view was good even though everything looked really tiny. we decided we couldn't afford to pay more because i was going to tokyo and allyssa is going to cambodia soon too.

im so so glad i managed to catch it or else i think i'd live to regret not watching it. hee. anyways the 4 of us were like screaming for our lives. we didnt quite belong to the last row cuz all the rest were very quiet and mature people. then we like oh what the hell... we screamed anyways. lol.

yesterday i was at wala again but this time with the people i least expected too. maybe some things happen for a reason? its weird how we ended up at wala but i did enjoy their company. might juz consider to hang out more with them? we left wala after the 2nd set cuz they both had to work early. sighhh... had to leave shirlyn abruptly which doesn't happen much. heh.

im beginning to miss her.. alot. piece of crap. is it juz wishful thinking on my part? *sigh* life is sucha bitch and love feels so outta reach... dammit!

am -bored-

2008-04-13T17:22:00.003+08:00

so here i am on a Sunday evening sitting in front of my comp, staying home to heal a bruise that my carnivorous chum gave to me. and also because i have a massive pimple brewing on my forehead, its hideous i dare not go out. haha

anyways i was juz telling a couple of friends yesterday of a very weird dream that i had. about how i was in hkg and then this friend came and told me that she had been single since she broke up with her bf in june last year.. and then we started kissing. hahaa how outrageous is that!

i was juz chatting with moo moo awhile ago and see what she drew. her trademark cow. i miss her! arrrgghhhhhh..
so my weekly sunday entries, how can i not blog about wala? yes i was there again last night and before belle gets to tell this story i better fess up myself. so we were sitting at the table between the stairs and the stage, not a very good table to be seated at yesterday cuz we were like blocking the passageway through to the stage. and anyways i decided not to let anyone through and belle was saying what if shirlyn wants to pass through then i was like if its her i'll get up then and before i knew it shirlyn was behind me shouting 'excuse me, excuse me!' and it caught me by surprise and i jumped out from my seat. yes i really jumped. BAH. *rolls eyes* oh and belle nearly wanted to kill herself cuz she sent a sms to the wrong person and of all people... haha i shan't even name names. yea i know how it feels.. 'i cant imagine i juz outdid myself again!' it juz gets better huh.. *grins*

10 days to tokyo... i feel so unprepared!

another one bites the dust!

2008-04-10T21:13:00.009+08:00

i really wanna go watch the queen musical, we will rock you. talked about it with gollaba & panahon last evening and we were supposed to go get the tix today but it totally slipped my mind! will do it tomorrow then or at the rate i procrastinate the run will end and i'd never be able to catch it untill who knows when.

oh and i think i jinxed myself. i was juz telling a friend yesterday that i was bored at work and it finally seems like its slowing down at work and then today i was like hit by a tornado or something. oh man... and the fat one got to me again. duds and gg was pissed with him too. still dont understand how a person like him can exist. and then i began to wonder if i annoy people so much too to the extent that they detest me? oh dear... that'd really be bad i'd really be upset. therefore i repeat myself again i dont understand why a person like him can exist and that he doesnt feel upset that he's upsetting everyone else around him?

and im so going to japan. woooohooo actually im not really excited to go japan but im merely excited for the fact that im going somewhere. anywhere out of sg is good. juz need a break. and i cant believe everything was done so last minute. like no planning and anything, juz like up and go. so 2 weeks later im gone... yeeeeeee haa! gotta watch out for the damage it does to my save-up-for-US fund though. ultimately my dream is still to go US or UK within this year. then i'll need to go through a toughie of whether its US or UK i'll be heading too.... dilemma.

highly disturbing friday..

2008-04-05T19:14:00.002+08:00

heard the most shocking piece of news early in the morning.. i think its by far the most shocking since the start of the year? or maybe it can even beat all the rest to be the most shocking of all? i think i shan't elaborate any further on wad happened because it'd be easy to guess who the individual is. ppl who are close to me... like chums and bestie, u all know. as for the rest u all dont have to know. -_-

sigh... i feel all the effort i made to pull u back to society cum reality has all gone to waste. to begin with, why did i even bother? im no saint. i guess i just didnt have the heart to see u goin on wasting ur life. there was really so much more in store for u. how could i make u see? this is the ultimatum whereby i can say ur life is really gonna be in the dumps. its about time i smarten up and leave u alone. u dont have to be sorry nor do u need to give me any answers. its really not necessary. i wish u a good life ahead.. although i highly doubt it may be any good.

went to ikea juz now... the damn place is like partially under renovation and there's really nothing much. ended up having meatballs and its prob the 1st time i went to ikea and didnt end up with a whole load of junk that i dont need (impulsive buying). ohh also swung by to queensway and got me a new pair of glasses. finally after how zachy killed my old pair. alrights i shld head for dinner and then to wala to see one of my fav girls. *grins*

had a long and painful week at work.. struggling to the next..

2008-03-30T22:49:00.003+08:00

think i had less than 20hrs of sleep combined from mon-fri.. worked till almost 3am everyday. its been really long and painful. how long more can we survive like that? when boss is not around we're always being bullied.. i have a new superior who thinks he was hired to be our saviour. all i can say is i WILL use him to try and improve things.. like why not? i've got nothing to lose and everything to gain anyways. we shall see what happens..

oh and the highlight this week will be meeting up with my favourite guest.. but its a pity she was sooooo busy and had to leave abruptly on fri when we had our drinks/dinner date set on saturday. damn. i wonder if she'd ever make it back cuz very soon she'd be posted to be based in London. and i didnt even make it to go Hkg and visit her. sighs. London will be too expensive for me to head to unless she throws in the air tix too on top of lodging and food? haha

and so i ended back at wala wala last night. had belle, allyssa, terry and duds.. but i think the 3 girls were bored cuz they didnt quite like the 'unxpected' kinda music. hee. sorry but i really adore shirlyn! :P

think next week will be slower for me cuz i hardly have any groups in-house which explains the 30% occupancy on Friday.. yikes. sure kenna shot again. oh wells isnt that life? u win some, u lose some? and after all the trouble/problems i went throught the past week i think i'd rather i have no groups and be doing nothing. either way i die. u peeps who work with me, im sure u know what i mean... *yawns*

batam easter getaway..

2008-03-23T23:06:00.004+08:00

so i was away from fri-sun to batam.. cheap and lousy recreation. haha. the whole frickin resort and ferries and everything else were packed with singaporeans. so much for trying to get away from s'pore and we still end up having to see them all over the place. but had a rather relaxing time overall.. lazing by the poolside reading my book, swimming, going to the spa..

i even made some friends there. was sitting by the poolside reading my book and this guy swam close to me and started talking.. 'interesting book huh?' cuz i was glued to it for a good hour or so? ended up he was from Iran.. and amidst all the Iranians groups that are giving me headaches at work, here i was making a friend with one of them. how ironic. haha. anyways turned out he's a very nice guy (i know we shouldn't be making such judgements after the 1st meeting) but he invited us for dinner and we chatted quite abit, found out quite alot abt him and his country? my knowledge of them was zilch before i met him. hahaha. so anyways the beauty of the whole thing was he paid for dinner and drinks *yay* i saved some money and its quite a fair bit wor. he'll be popping by in sg before heading back home so we might still meet again cuz he stays at MM, wanna bring biz to CCS but MM is really chargin much lesser for more than we can offer. haha :x
its funny.. the previous time i went to batam i made a friend there too and he too paid for an expensive dinner. im beginning to think batam is a fun place to go too... lol

bloody fricking headache..

2008-03-16T21:55:00.002+08:00

been having a headache since i left work on sat morning.. sucks. anyways i cldnt believe i stayed at work till 6am. cleared damn alot of work.. and helmi was nice and stayed with me from abt 5-6am cuz he thought i'd be scared being in the office alone? silly... i went home and i still cld stay awake to watch like 2 episodes of sex and the city before i started dozing off. so i went to bed at around 8am and got up at around 3pm?

fellow emo elmo asked if i wanted to go to wala's and well there's where we ended up. i think of all the times i've been to wala's, yesterday was the weirdest crowd i've ever encountered. there were cam whores (there they were taking pics non-stop with the constant flashes of light blinding us), bar-top dancer wannabe --> and there was this other table of ppl watching her and trying to imitate her, a guy in a black and white scarf whom i saw last wk (wearing the exact same ugly scarf) who apparently tried to imitate shirlyn singing and the table in front of us had a fat guy who tried to be funny and started shaking his butt or was he trying to dance, oh and at his table there was also this middle-aged lady who every now and then tried to sneak peeks at bestie? *faints* bestie, i think its u... its becuz of u thats why there were such weird ppl ard??! its never happened before! haha damn funny la!

today, bro left zachary at our place for a few hrs cuz he needed to go out to run some errands. that cute lil piece of crap. adore him to bits. well as usual he messed up the whole place. mum and i brought him to the playground.. he's so cute. he went around saying hi to all the uncles & aunties and tried to play with the rest of the kids. he's really well-behaved. im impressed how my bro and sis-in-law disciplined him so well. after that went to my aunt's for dinner cuz it was my grandma's 77th birthday. so cool... she's still so healthy and happy. i wish for her to be like that for many many many more years to come! my aunt bought this choco cake that tastes something like choco royal hazelnut crunch but it was wayyyyyy too sweet. sugar overdose... *dies* lol

im losing my sanity..

2008-03-12T22:56:00.002+08:00

i got really upset this morning while at work. found out some piece of shit went directly against my instructions and i had to find it out myself. all hell broke loose and i lost it. i sent out an email which i thought was rather tame but thereafter i got comments that it was a tad too harsh? i think i've really gotten to the point where i think 'enough is enough'.. why should i tolerate all this kinda nonsense and 'go down on my knees and face the music' from the clients. maybe someday we shall pass the buck over and then they'd realise its really no fun. till then.. more suffering.

scary monday.

2008-03-10T23:01:00.002+08:00

started off the day with a morning meeting of many people being blasted at... it was a darn scary scenario. kinda like a domino effect thingy. boss finds an innocent individual to spark off the anger and she goes into a killing rampage thereafter. thank goodness i escaped unscath.. *phew* so the whole day i was wary of the ground i was treading on, didnt wanna step on a mine and blast myself into 'ritz' bitz. left work on the dot to escape being 'killed'.

while waiting for taxidoor we bumped into ed and ah tee. ah tee said something funny that i juz had to blog it down... ah tee, u pulled it off SUPERBLY! u deserve an award or something man... anyways i was asking him how come a friend didnt get laid while they were on holiday together and he replied something like that with a straight face...

"she felt like she was participating in a tupperware competition, to see who was the tightest.."

it took a while to register and when it finally did, we all broke into laughter. only u can come up with such shit but it was all done in the name of good fun. :o)

friday was a rubbishy day, saturday was cool, sunday kinda sucked..

2008-03-09T22:41:00.002+08:00

i think the blog title says it all? chum, wasn't at work on thurs and fri. hope your eye is urmm good again? i needed to leave the office on time on friday cuz i had somewhere to go and that fat blob had to make me clear his nonsense while he happily went for dinner with his clients. really a fat useless bastard. shall not go into that again... so i left the office slightly later then i should have but i still got to meet my friend in time cuz she was kinda late too. it was a nice and quiet night (albeit the lousy sound system) we had over some drinks. hey emo bestie.. i like hanging with u. haha

saturday.. went for a haircut at jason's and i look like a little ball now. and when i told belle she was like 'aww.. how cute!' duh! and she said she has a helmet too.. lol poor us. went to watch meet the spartans which is absolutely dumb. *dies* cant believe its even stupider than scary movies... thereafter of cuz i went to wala's.. shirlyn's still not feeling well and coughing. poor girl. but she still sang well.

sunday.. was supposed to have a site inspection with JTB at 1530hrs and they decided to call me at 1300hrs to say they would like to make it earlier cuz they're already in the area so i confidently told them 1400hrs. so i had to rush down to work by cab and i only got there around 1420hrs. oops i forgot that the idiotic IT fair was still on for today. anyways i was really apologetic when i got there but it seemed like they were enjoying their drinks at lobby lounge. cheapos. and the whole site was done in less than 20mins. bloody waste of my sunday to go back to work. ended up clearing abit of work and headed off to have some coffee with nickole and frankie. i miss those days we used to hang out after work... oh wells... life moves on.. even tho i hope time would standstill now so that i dont have to go back to work tomorrow! arghhhhhhh..

this sucks..

2008-03-03T19:29:00.003+08:00

i've never seen chums in sucha foul mood before. it scares me... alot. its as if she were about to chew off someone's head? i dont wanna be that someone who gets her head chewed off... so i stayed out of her way as much as i could but being noisy me it didnt work very well. im sorry if i still got on your nerves even though the signs were shouting 'LEAVE ME ALONE!' as u can see i dont read signs very well but i like to think of myself as quite smart when it comes to reading road signs tho.

i dunno wad i can do to cheer u up but it upsets me to see u like that also. i hope u see this and by then u're feeling a teeny weeny bit betta then juz now? if there's one thing i can do to make u feel betta pls do let me know and i'll try my best to...

makes me wonder.. am i partially/fully the cause of u being in sucha foul mood thats why u didnt wanna talk to me too? well if i am.. im sorry. i didnt mean to... make u upset. i know to a certain extent u're not pleased that i didnt manage to leave and u havent been wanting to talk abt it because it didnt make me feel good. i never thought it wld in turn consume u and made u this scary person.. i really didnt wish for things to take the sudden turn and throw me off balance. im really at a loss myself. im juz passing each day as it comes...

im really sorry..

sex and the city

2008-03-02T23:01:00.009+08:00

watched a whole season of sex and the city at von's place.. from the previous visit till yday and we completed the whole of season 6 i think. i like that show. never really got down to watching it before but its like once u start u can stop. im gonna get me dad to buy me the whole set of sex and the city and queer as folk dvds... queer as folk is another show i've always wanted to watch but never got a chance to so who cares if it burns a hole in dad's pocket... la la la!i cldnt care less! ha!

here are some phrases i came across from sex and the city.. some are cute, some make sense and some are juz too sex-inclined?! haha

"You can't be friends with a squirrel! A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit." -Carrie

"Sex with an ex can be depressing. If it's good, you don't have it anymore; if it's bad, you just had sex with an ex." -Samantha

"Fuck me badly once, shame on you. Fuck me badly twice, shame on me." -Samantha (chum, u used something similar to this on me before right??)

"Practically all the relationships I know are based on a foundation of lies and mutually accepted delusion." -Samantha

oh of course one of the draws to watching sex and the city is jason lewis, he's really cute! and someone told me to go US and find someone like him. and my reply was i will, go to US and get acquainted to a guy (hopefully someone that looks 1/10 of jason lewis) and never come back here. hahaha *drools* i might juz turn damn straight if i can get my hands on someone so *swoons* fucking good looking! hubba hubba.... lol

i don't really fancy jogging..

2008-02-26T00:42:00.003+08:00

so gf was telling me she planned to go jogging.. and taxidoor was like trying to plan bring her to west coast to jog? like huh i cant imagine... u mean he actually planned to drive there and job and drive home? sounds weird to me.. why can't u juz jog in the vicinity? petrol is not cheap! but anyhows i juz kept quiet... didnt wanna get myself into taxidoor's bad books. wont do me any good. heehee

so anyways after hearing all that talk how can u not get inspired to go for a jog yourself? so i got home grabbed some bread to munch on cuz i was STARVING and changed into my joggin attire... off i went together with my mp3 player to keep me entertained. so i didnt know where to head towards... i've abt tried every possible route around my area so my legs juz brought me towards ghim moh and i didnt wanna contest where my legs wanted to go cuz i needed it to bring me back home. was jogging then i suddenly remembered i dont like to jog. like yucks. its like the most boring exercise ever. its even worse to be jogging on a treadmill. gosh. can never figure out how come ppl enjoy jogging... yes i know ppl who actually REALLY do enjoy it. eeeeeeeks freeeeeeeeeaks! oh btw after i got back from my jog i decided to text gf and ask her if she brokea leg or something but ended up she didnt go jogging at all.. *rolls eyes to high heavens* but i saw that coming la... lol

now i feel bad for leaving my fellow girl in the office alone to fend for herself. im sorry but i really didnt feel like staying back in the office today. in fact i dont feel like it everyday but im being forced to cuz of the amount of work we have and no im not comparing the amount of work i have as to yours because i know yours is MASSIVE. u really need to start speaking up for yourself. if you don't no one will know you're suffering and you'll just have to bear with it in silence... you gotta wise up, girl....

past week sucks..

2008-02-24T17:06:00.002+08:00

its been alot of hard work the past week... many late nights spent in the office. how long more must this go on for? from the looks of it, its gonna be like that till the day i leave. and now the question is when will i finally be able to leave? im neither here nor there now.. yes i am very disappointed in myself that i wasnt able to pull it off. and i dont need anyone of u rubbing it in. i feel bad enough as it is.

am glad that the unxpected is back in action at wala's after the loooooooooong cny break. they totally rawked last night! and of course i enjoyed it with the company of my comfort drink... mr kil-kenny. :P though i started to get sleepy sometime in btwn the sets but i got thru the very end where they always do an oldie mouldie song like a blast from the past kinda thing, something that the band has never played rehearsed together on.. it was a really weird song, something really out of the world. the song had an odd melody and some lyrics about Sally and Alice.... and 'who the fuck is Alice'??!! like huh... belle and i were totally lost and so the moment they finish we juz upped and left. ha. oh and i was really upset with my gf last night. texted her and she IGNORED me! i was really upset..... hmpfs!

alrights... im really bored now. shall wait for the sun to go down slightly and i'll go for my once-a-week jog.. not sure if it helps much after all the junk i eat for the entire week but at least im making an effort? ha nice try huh............. toodles~

P.S. I Love You..

2008-02-17T15:41:00.002+08:00

finally got to watch the show.. i've been waiting and wanting to watch it since nov/dec last yr cuz i read about it on some magazine. well who's surprised they only decided to hold it back to valentine's to air it? bleh! i really liked the show! im a sucker for such shows... i cried so much i was shy to leave the theatre. i felt so much for 'Holly', my heart ached for her. *sniffs & sigh* i wonder i'll ever find someone who loves me so much that until when they die they do such things for me? i mean not that i want them to die but yea u get me, don't cha?

so after the movie, we decided to get out of town because it was too crowded for our comfort. we hate crowds. decided to find a quiet place to sit down and have a couple of beers while we talk. ended up in this nice bar at ann siang hill. nice and quiet place to chill but im guessing the bar wont last for much longer. then again along that stretch there's many more bars and restaurants to venture on to. talked alot and i realised we've drifted very far apart all this time. i hope u buck up and move on.. think i've done all i can to help u back on ur feet, the rest is all up to u now.

after ann siang hill we moved on to robertson quay. that place used to only have a few restaurants and bars now like at least 10-20 others have spruced out of no where. mainly jap restaurants. settled for a beer place which served pizzas and finger food, wasnt all too bad cuz they had kilkenny! i mean no matter how bad the food was there's kilkenny so all is fine still! but the food wasnt all that bad. im juz tryin to praise the existence of kilkenny. lol. so we juz sat there and talked/drank so much more until the sleepiness sank in and we decided to call it a day.

'Now being without you takes a lot of getting used to
I should learn to leave with it..

You're a hard habit to break'

i think i've finally done it...

cny visiting...

2008-02-10T21:58:00.000+08:00

as usual, cny is always a very boring and sickening time for me. during the past years i cld always get outta it cuz i was 'conveniently' doing shift work and all i had to go for were the meals and scoots i was outta there.. dont need to wayang and entertain the annoying ppl we call relatives. but this yr wasnt half as bad i thought it'd be. the relatives decided to go slow on me this yr? or maybe cuz i had this 'u betta not start questioning me abt the shit im trying to avoid or i'll chew ur head off' face. lol. yea so it was all good... and all the attention was on lil zachary. phew.

oh then another thing i muz touch on... why is it that my ang pow collection is decreasing year by year?? my mum came up with her conclusion that at my age i shouldnt be collecting ang pows but giving them out instead. but crap la im not married so i am entitled to collect ang pows wad! and i deserve more too! like ppl who are left on the shelf dont we deserve some sympathy and given more $ to tide them over this difficult period where we have to face all the lovey dovey families and their oh-so-cute children (yes, sarcasm intended)?!

anyways on 初二 belle, von and i decided to meet up for dinner. we really had enough of the boring visiting.. juz sitting there or getting into senseless conversations juz becuz we happened to be sitting next to each other (in btwn we'd be staring at the walls cuz we ran out of stuff to talk abt and its not like i really wanna talk). either that or i'd be busy munching away trying to look preoccupied so that they'll juz leave me alone. call me anti-social but im not able to be sociable and get myself stuck in a conversation i dont wanna be involved in(if u know what i mean). so anyways back to the outing with the girls... so belle had to start a charitable organisation called 'save the lonely people'.. lol shan't elaborate on that here. and then we ended up at jack's place having our juicy steaks cuz it was one of those days i felt like having a steak and it really doesnt come very often. oh oh and while we were eating the fireworks came on. didnt expect it but we had a rather good view from the restaurant. we didnt wanna go back yet after dinner so we decided to drive ard and we ended up at kallang waterfront where the stretch of restaurants are. we bgt a few beers and had a good time chatting as always. i love my girlies!

初三 i spent the whole day at home watching telly.. pure bliss.

初四 went over to my aunt's place today cuz 1 of my cousin's came back from korea so we decided to get together. she's been away for 2 years but came back every now and then. so i heard she's back till sept and then moving to somewhere else again but she hasnt quite decided where. at times i wish i cld be like here. give up everything for her passion and even though she doesnt earn much but at least she enjoys wad she's doing. i mean isnt that wad life is all abt? doing things that u enjoy.. i guess as long as u earn enough to make ends meet, it beats having a job u hate yet earn alot and in turn u do stuff with the money u make to try and cheer urself up? im not sure if im making sense here but yea... try deciphering it in ur own way.

now im horribly upset cuz i have to go back to sucky work in a few hours time... why does time have to pass by so quickly when i dont have to work and it seems to last eons when im waiting for work to end??!! crap! utterly crap!!!!!

Happy New Year!~~

2008-02-07T00:04:00.000+08:00

Happy New Year!

Contradicting as this may sound.. May the year of the "rat" be free of rodents in our lives. I'm sure u all know what i mean and what i'm driving at...

May health and wealth be with us!

high tension, highly disturbed..

2008-02-05T22:42:00.000+08:00

Wake in a sweat again
Another day's been laid to waste
In my disgrace

Stuck in my head again
Feels like I'll never leave this place
There's no escape

I'm my own worst enemy

I've given up
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say

Take this all away
I'm suffocating
Tell me what the fuck is wrong
With me

I don't know what to take
Thought I was focused but I'm scared
I'm not prepared

I hyperventilate
Looking for help somehow somewhere
And no one cares

I'm my own worst enemy

I've given up
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say

Take this all away
I'm suffocating
Tell me what the fuck is wrong
With me

Goddddddd!!!!

Put me out of my misery
Put me out of my misery
Put me out of my
Put me out of my fucking misery

I've given up
I'm sick of feeling
Is there nothing you can say

Take this all away
I'm suffocating
Tell me what the fuck is wrong
With me

"Given Up - Linkin Park"

i failed in my attempt. im not surprised, im juz not equipped to be able to pit myself against someone in her own territory. for the record, u weren't the only one losing sleep over this. i'll stay... but the question again is for how long? my heart is no longer there. i know not who i can trust anymore. friends or foe, i cant differentiate anymore. best is i juz keep really quiet and hope this nagging problem goes away. well... will it ever?

no more drama.. i am a simpleton.

2008-02-05T00:52:00.000+08:00

So tired, tired of all this drama
You go your way and I'll go my way
I need to be free
I'm so tired, tired, tired from all this drama

Broken heart again
Another lesson learned
Better know your friends
Or else you will get burned
Gotta count on me
'Cos I can guarantee
That I'll be fine

No more pain
No more pain
No more drama in my life
No one's gonna make me hurt again

Why'd I play the fool
Go through ups and downs
Knowing all the time
You wouldn't be around
But maybe I like the stress
'Cos I was young and restless
But that was long ago
I don't wanna cry no more

No more pain, no more pain
No more games
Messin' with my mind
No more drama in my life
No one's gonna make me hurt again, no more
No more tears, I'm tired of crying every night
No more fears, I really don't wanna fight
No more drama in my life
I don't ever wanna hurt again
Wanna speak my mind, wanna speak my mind

Oh, It feels so good
When you let go of all the drama in your life
Now you're free from all the pain
Free from all the games
Free from all the pain
Free from all the stress
To find your happiness

I don't know
Only God knows where the story ends for me
But I know where the story begins
It's up to us to choose
Whether we win or lose
And I choose to win

(No more pain, no more pain, tired of hurting
(No more games)
Tired of your playin' games with my mind
No more drama in my life
No more, no more, no more
No more, no more, no more
No more tears, no more crying every night
No more waking me up in the morning with your disturbing phone calls
Leave me alone, go ahead

(No more pain) No more, I'm tired
No more games, I'm tired, I'm so tired
(No drama) No more, no more
(No more in my life)
No more, no more, no more, no more, no more

(No more drama)
I'm tired of all the drama
(No more drama)
Go 'head, go 'head
(No more drama)
Your demons gettin' out of my face
Goin' out my life
(No more drama)
I'm about to lose my mind
Lord help me, help me sing

No more drama

Oh help me sing
I need a piece of mind
A piece of mind, piece of mind
Well, I need
I need to know that you agree
Oh no, oh no
No more, no more, no more drama
No more drama in my, in my life

So tired, I'm so tired
So tired, tired of all this drama
Go ahead with all your drama

"No More Drama - Mary J. Blige"

i think throughout my whole working life, however short it may be, today has been by far the most dramatic day. i dont understand why ppl muz behave the way they do? defensive, aggresive and everyone seems to have a hidden agenda. am i the only simple person left on this planet? am i really wrong to wanna give up, pack up and leave? i mean how fun is it having to feel like a headless chicken walking around in a live firing range, not knowing when i'll be shot down. hello people, im only here to earn a decent living, and mind u im not being paid big bucks for me to tolerate the immense nonsense. why muz everyone trample on each other? why cant we work together, help each other and juz fucking get things done so we can all call it a day? i dont wanna be caught amidst any tussles over money or power, i honestly dont give a fucking damn abt any of that. seriously... u people really need to get a life. concentrate on other things that gives u a better quality lifestyle. whatever that may be.. for now, please fucking leave me alone!

pre-cny gathering..

2008-02-04T01:18:00.000+08:00

had a mini get-together at a friend's place today. it was fun. supposed to be a lunch thingy but it dragged on to dinner and watching dvds till midnight. no complains whatsoever cuz it was good company, altho the last part of watching the sex in the city dvds evolved into trying-to-stay-awake campaign. poor chums. haha. thanks for dyeing my hair. now i need to be very conscious of not sitting under the lights or it'd be too obvious?! -grumbles- :P

anyways, moving along.. while chattin with a friend a certain topic arosed. don't really know how to put into words but in short its abt how a certain individual has started to make me feel repulsive and disgusted towards the actions and behaviour. i have examples to testify y im feeling this way. its not juz baseless allegations. and i have to be very diplomatic and tactful abt this cuz who knows if that individual will ever chance upon my blog? in any case i shall leave it as it is and not state the examples. my only advice if you ever get to see this and by some weird chance u think i might juz be referring to u... yes, u. pls get a fucking life of ur own... wake up, its time to move on.....

1) the world DOES NOT revolve around u.
2) everything is NOT juz about u.
3) DONT conveniently start blaming someone when something bad happens, or something against ur liking happens.
4) DO NOT treat another person as ur spare, ppl are not there for u to fall back on.
5) please brush up on ur english, think u really need to improve ur vocabulary. we're finding it hard to understand u. and no, we're not abt to start improving our mandarin for ur sake.

alrights.. i shall be a meanie no further. if u really think im referring to u, try comforting urself. 'im sure ah fun is not referring to me' repeat that 10 times and u'll be fine. i personally assure that.

peace out.

rage against the machine.. or against the man?

2008-01-30T00:54:00.000+08:00

Killing in the name of!

Some of those that were forces are the same that bore crosses

Well now you do what they told ya

Those who died are justified, for wearing the badge, they're the chosen whites
You justify those that died by wearing the badge, they're the chosen whites

Some of those that were forces are the same that bore crosses

Killing in the name of

And now you do what they told ya
And now you do what they told ya, now you're under control
And now you do what they told ya!

Those who died are justified, for wearing the badge, they're the chosen whites
You justify those that died by wearing the badge, they're the chosen whites

Come on!

Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me
Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me!

Motherfucker!

"Killing in the Name of - Rage Against the Machine"

as u all can see i have alot of anger in my system.. pardon me and the song lyrics i've posted above. i juz dont understand how such a person can exist in this world??! i know your english is not very good but im sure u'll have heard of this world called 'ashamed'? yes, pls be very ashamed of urself. i despise u! *spits* if u think u're doing alot of work think again... think VERY HARD. yes u may stay late at times but issit productive? NO! i wash my hands off u.. its high time u wake up ur idea cuz ur lil shock absorber here is leaving... very soon. may all the shit befall on u and that u be immensely covered in it.

*Disclaimer: I AM NOT ANTI-CHRIST!*

Muse - Time is Running out

2008-01-23T00:24:00.000+08:00

how appropriate... dedicated to the one biggest a**hole around me..

I think I'm drowning
Asphyxiated
I wanna break this spell
That you've created

You're something beautiful
A contradiction
I wanna play the game
I want the friction

You will be the death of me
You will be the death of me

Bury it
I won't let you bury it
I won't let you smother it
I won't let you murder it

Our time is running out (more like YOUR time is running out, oh wad difference does it make to YOU anyway? YOU don't ever do anything in a timely manner! NO F*CKING SENSE OF URGENCY!!!)
Our time is running out
You can't push it underground
You can't stop it screaming out

I wanted freedom
Bound and restricted
I tried to give you up
But I'm addicted

Now that you know I'm trapped sense of elation
You'd never dream of
Breaking this fixation

You will squeeze the life out of me

Bury it
I won't let you bury it
I won't let you smother it
I won't let you murder it

Our time is running out
Our time is running out
You can't push it underground
You can't stop it screaming out
How did it come to this?
Oh

You will suck the life out of me

Bury it
I won't let you bury it
I won't let you smother it
I won't let you murder it

Our time is running out
Our time is running out
You can't push it underground
You can't stop it screaming out
How did it come to this?
Oh

"Time is Running out - Muse"

first trip of 2008..

2008-01-20T16:04:00.000+08:00

i was thinking how fortunate it was that my first trip overseas for 2008 will be paid for by the company. air tix and accommodation all paid for cept for the 1st few nights which was on pax account but thats fine at least i saved on the air tix.

oh well i guess everything comes with a price. the course i went for was really painful. 3.5 days of intensive gruelling classes. had tough role plays, questions thrown all around (in your face kind) and worse of all a written test at the end of it all. im still worried now that i fail... i'd be the first one to go down in history that failed this test!! *crossing my fingers* dunno when the results will be out tho but i think its sometime this week.

i didnt really take much pictures, im sure u all know im not the kind that fancies taking pics so i didnt even bring a cammy along. all these lousy pics were taken with my trusty ol phone.

we stayed at conrad bkk for the first 2 nights-fri & sat and sucha coincidence that mich (our fav sec to dosm was there too!) we went ard to a couple of places tog. mich and her hubby brought us to some good food places. woohoo. and we went to chatuchak tog on sat. it seems to be operatin on a smaller scale tho. i didnt remember it to have so few stalls? or maybe we were walkin ard in circles? oh wells... u muz know that i was with 2 gurls where i constantly had to look out for them. 1 walks on alone, fast-paced without checkin on where the rest of us are, the other is slow-paced and tends to be abit blur. *rolls eyes* but they're really nice girls. got to know them much better on this trip. i mean we dont talk much in the office and they kinda dont regard me in their group due to some reasons which i know of. ahhh work relationships are always very tacky and u know wad i dont really care, totally not bothered. dont plan to stick ard for long anyways.

our nice corner (slightly bigger) room at conrad bkk

checked out of conrad bkk on sunday to head over to hilton millenium bkk where the course was being held at. kinda missed conrad bkk cuz the location's darn good. near shoppin areas and cab fares were like abt 50 baht. moved to hilton where its out of the way near the chao phraya river but there are alot of nice hotels ard that area, mandarin oriental/marriott/sheraton/peninsula/shang.. mostly tapping on holiday-makers. i think they isolated us to that hotel so that we wont party so much and end up sleepin in class. well even tho we didnt party i still had difficulty staying awake in class... being me, its understandable. haha.

i have no idea wad jean was trying to do? haha

our staple form of transport while staying at hilton.

alrights thats abt all the pics i have.. if jean and joey ever forwards me anymore pics i'll post them up again...
toodles~

Sleepy Saturday & Sabbath Sunday..

2008-01-08T00:05:00.000+08:00

slept in on sat. logged on after i woke up, realise that the only time and strength i have to log on are mostly on weekends. damn, how i miss those days when i was on leave. not having a worry in the world, except maybe what to eat for lunch/dinner, whats there to watch on telly and whats there to blog about? lol. so anyways the plan was to go to wala's (like wads new) but didnt feel like eating chic wings and meatballs for dinner so we headed to the hawker ctr next door for dinner before proceeding to wala's for our usual dosage of beer. shirlyn and the unxpected rocked hard as i fought hard to contain my excitement. lol. oh and chums decided to come by with taxidoor cuz she missed the chic wings but she refused to join me upstairs. dont understand why she doesnt like shirlyn, she's so damn cute la! and besides the chinese has this saying 'ai wu ji wu'? u're supposed to try and like the stuff i like? hahahahahahaaaaa...

skipped church on sun cuz i was supposed to meet liz for brunch but we both ended up waking up at 2+ so brunch was kinda out then we moved it to dinner instead. and then i told mummy i cldnt go church cuz i was going for brunch and ended up when she came back from church i was still in bed. oops :P so liza had to go back to the hotel to finish some work. workaholic *rolls eyes* i really have something against ppl who work too hard nowadays. not that im jealous of them but i feel wads the point? are they appreciated? NO! if u do well at work thats wads expected of u, if u dont do well then they screw u. so fuck it la! then cuz liz was already in the hotel of cuz she psychoed me to dine at the hotel so she didnt have to waste time travelling ard and me being a no brainer of cuz agreed. ha. so we dined at cherry garden. i muz say the food and presentation beats GP hands down. had a 6-course dinner, thank goodness i didnt have to pay for it! but then no matter how good the food was it was ruined by a 'passer-by'. i was like rolling my eyes to high heavens when i saw her, of all ppl! my ex boss.. one that i totally detest! eerrrrggghhhh major turn-off! *rolls eyes* ok pls enjoy the pics i took. ENJOY cuz i was made to feel like a fricking dumb tourist clicking away with my camera phone in a rather quiet and empty restaurant. haha

1st course - soft shell crab with watermelon slices

3rd course - some black pepper beef thingy (2nd course was sharks fins soup boiled with shark catilege)

4th course - sea perched wrapped in tofu skin and deep fried (this was really good! and coming from a non-fish fan, u really need to trust me on this. juicy on the inside and very crispy on the outside.)

5th course - fried rice with abalone and mushrooms (woohoo such extravagance, abalone!)

6th/last course - DESSERT! mango sago with lime sorbet. (its so cool it came with like dried ice underneath and i thought it looked rather fascinating)

okok so much for food and so much for me trying to be on a diet. haha. shanice came to meet us for drink after dinner so we proceeded to axis bar for drinks. had a hoe and a orangetini. did some catching up cuz i havent met shanice for longest time, another one who joined SQ. whereas for liz she's signed a lifetime bond with MO, juz like how u sell your soul to the demons. think the description is apt! dont u think so?

the flyer, the dreamer and the soul-less. haha

orites, time for bed.. i foresee another tough day ahead at work and u know wad? it doesnt take alot to foresee that! dammitz dammitz dammitz dammitz dammitz dammitz!

counting down, a quiet affair.

2008-01-01T17:32:00.000+08:00

remember the past few years i counted down in the hotel because i was always on duty back then. this year it felt kinda odd cuz i didnt really know where to head to. anyways it was considered a quiet affair to me as compared to past years. had dinner at chums place with her hubby, ah beng and ah lian cuz they were there playing MJ.. as always. ha. it was good fun tho. a satisfying dinner and it even came with choco fondue even tho we were so stuffed already!

we headed down to wala's after dinner and it was pretty packed with ang mohs.. as usual. luckily we managed to find seats. i wld say holland village was a pretty good place to count down at. the crowd was just enough to make an impact yet it wasnt too crowded. i hate overcrowded places, makes me nauseous and gives me a headache. when the time came somehow the few bars there kinda had their own countdowns? the timing like not synchro one. haha but there was alot of noise, party poppers, sparklers blah blah.... managed to take a few pics with my sucky hp...

look at the mess after the whole countdown. luckily we have kids like that who aspire to take up the noble profession of road sweepers/cleaners! woooooohoooooooo~

ushering in the new year, 2008.

2007-12-31T15:38:00.000+08:00

so here we are.. at the very last day of the year 2007. this year has been a pretty trying one for me (as like all the past years?) i find it really hard to look back and try to reflect on all that happened during this year. maybe i shan't, or i'd probably start crying which is not a very good start for the new year.

having said all that i suppose the only thing im glad which happened during this year were the great pals i found (u all know who u are). but of course special mention would go to my smally chums aka gf. like in the lil card u wrote, im equally as glad u came into my life and how amazing it really has been that our friendship deepened so much within such a short period of time. honestly, words will never be able to express how much u mean to me. thanks for being my pillar of support, be it at work, personal, family.. u were always there for me. *muaks* i love u.

and for the new year... i have nothing much to say. i dont make resolutions because i know i can never keep to them. so lets juz bow our heads, clasp our hands, grit our teeth and pray hard that this new year will be great for one and all.

oh and for all difficult years (starting from the time i cld think sensibly on my own) i've had i always like to do something 'painful' nearing the end of the year to remind myself that i made it through alive. so 2007 was one of these years....

Cheers to all~ lets get drunk...

sudden attack of frustration?

2007-12-30T23:55:00.000+08:00

so its almost midnight and i had a sudden urge that i really need to drink so here i am with my nice bottle of hoe (which happens to be my last, damn itz). not sure why but the urge came with a bout of frustration? is that how alcoholics feel?

so today i planned to stay home, watch telly and to keep mum company but someone had to call me to go out. lets name this person t. so t was in orchard alone and me knowing that i was that someone t wld call juz to fill in the in between gaps in t's life, i still went ahead to meet t. rushed out and everything so we met to have a late lunch. after lunch t decided that we shld go home and i was like WHAT? so i was left speechless and we shared a cab back. a short lil trip like that burnt almost $50. it leaves me wondering sometimes y am i always the sucker/dork/idiot/dumbass? y do i subject myself to such nonsense? y cant i reject ppl nicely? juz say no? i think one of my new year's resolution wld be that.

so now its back to my lonely bot of hoe and me..

congrats to mr tan ah beng and mrs tan ah lian!

2007-12-30T02:58:00.000+08:00

as u can see 29/12/2007 was the big day for leonard and shimin, they held their wedding banquet at pan pac. i quite enjoyed it, think its due to the company and also the couple were pretty sporting when we tried to make them drink. but wasnt too impressed with the service staff, especially the one serving our table. gosh... damn annoying. anyways frankie and i had the time of our life bitching abt her. ha

anyways i felt like a freakshow on the loose.. very uncomfortable in what i was wearin. chums and shimin disallowed me to wear jeans so i had no choice but to dress the way i did. half the time i was fidgeting, making sure the shawl was concealing my humongous beer belly. gosh.. how torturous. and so it came to the part we were tryin to make the bride drink and she had to 'strip' me... take my shawl away from me and everyone started snapping pics, paparazzis! here's one for the record.. compliments of *ahem*... tsk

had to take a picture with the bride even tho she 'stripped' me... bleh

then they wanted to go for drinks after the dinner ended and i was game but suddenly received a sms from mummy saying she was vomitting and felt giddy and all. so we juz took some pictures and i headed home. thank u chums for sendin me back home to mummy, sorry we didnt manage to go for drinks. think it wld have been fun? but there can always be another time... ? alrights, shall go off to try and attend to mummy now. its 315 and she still cant get to sleep.. sigh

its swell not having to work

2007-12-26T00:46:00.000+08:00

so well... i've been on leave from the 14th of Dec and its gonna go on till the 2nd of Jan. haven't accomplished much these 2 wks. juz growing fat cuz 'tis the season to be fatty'.. haha. feeling lazy too which explains why i haven't been blogging as much as i used to.

its juz swell not having to work. ahhh if only such good times wld last. i mean i cld dont work but that'd mean i wun have money to spend to which is totally sucky. so anyways lemme summarise wad went on for the past 2 wks. been going out quite abit. to watch movies, for lunches and dinners, for xmas shopping (it got so bad until i was losing my appetite cuz my brains were totally f*cked thinking of wad to buy). other than all that i was spending a good part of my time boozing (of course, thats like a staple in my life) can never do without it. and how cld i do without wala's.... heh

spent xmas eve at wala's cuz the unxpected was playing there. thanks to bello's friends who 'donated' drinks to us we both got quite darn high, to the extent i was slurring and bell was wobbling ard. not a very nice sight. haha. but i had a great time nontheless. shan't elaborate much or my gf wld start her nonsense again. pls dont do the big gang-up together on me again? puhhhhleaseeeeeee...?

today we met for lunch at skinny chums place and did gift exchange there. had fun with the whole buncha old groupies. =) then we dropped by the office for smally chums to drop off her pressies to all in the office. realised almost everyone got pressies for me too and panicked, luckily chums allowed me to 'share' her pressies. sucha lifesaver as always. came home and ripped open all the pressies after dinner. its amazing how much time u take to wrap something (i hate wrapping) and how effortless it is to rip the wrapping apart in juz a matter of seconds?? and chums says i cant wrap.. hey i tried ok! i nv had to do such things myself before... bear with me alright??! anyways back to the pressies, lets only touch on those which made an impression on me.. so to mention there's only like 2. the one chums got for me, which is like 2 smurf lil piggy banks. yea cuz i ever told her i like smurfs and its almost like extinct in sg? she managed to find these 2 lil cuties in hkg and thanks for the really sweet note that came along with it. i can nv describe how glad i am to have found a friend like u. *muaks* ok then comes the other not very nice one... it came in a crappy brown wrapper that looks reused, when i tore it open this very weird smell arosed.. its a shoe freshener?! and 1 look at the packaging u know its been sitting in a deserted corner for very long. i mean dont u feel embarrassed giving away such presents? cuz i feel disgusted receiving it... if u really dont feel like giving then don't. nobody is forcing u to, like with a knife to ur throat? i know what it means when they say its the thought that counts.. i'd rather u have wrote me a short and simple note juz saying merry xmas and i'd have felt better than receiving a present like that... wad say u all???!

whats wrong with thee humankind nowadays? -_-

my newfound jealousy

2007-12-02T22:49:00.000+08:00

darn! the weekend has come and is goin off in a jiffy. its so not fair. havent had time to do much... and so i was back at my fav hangout yday. didnt drink hoe tho, settled for kilkenny (refer back to my previous post on hoe overdose).

i think i really like shirlyn from the unxpected. dont ya all think she excudes attitude? *swoons* can never get enough of her singing albeit the bunch of malay/indian a**holes (im sorry for sounding racist but i dont see other races behaving like them) who were making a hell lotta NOISE.

anyways i texted my fellow emo elmo to tell her i like shirlyn and her reply was like 'ha i already know that. took you long enough to realise!' .............................. *speechless*

today i actually managed to get up at 9am to go to church with mummy, zachy and my bro. sis-in-law is out of town. hasn't been a great wk for me, didnt sleep well becuz of some weird incident. think when ur spirits are low, things tend to happen to u. it was quite a good sermon today, abt xmas. the pastor's quite interesting, brought in alot of present day incidents that we can relate too and also with some humour. who knows i might juz go back to church on a regular basis... and it helps that mum keeps insisting? besides i get to play with zach who drooled all over me today *tsk*. best thing when i pecked him on his cheek he went like 'wet wet, wet wet' when he's the one drooling all over! *rolls eyes* but i still love him... silly ah poo.

dedicated to my one and only crabbie...

2007-11-25T23:59:00.000+08:00

no matter how far away u are, u know deep down inside i still love u. *muaks*

hoe overdose.

2007-11-25T18:47:00.000+08:00

after a long long time ah ho finally decided to ask me to wala's, well how could i reject her even though i was down with bad stomach cramps? had to ask skinny chums along cuz i miss her so much. thanks for making the effort to come down after a long day at work. =) ah ho asked ah yao along cuz they bumped into each other at work but ah yao played us out, i kinda expected it la. bello and al cldnt make it too cuz they had ent with the hrcc idiots. buncha fools trying to fleece us juz cuz they're gonna help to answer the rsvns phonecalls. comp stay and free meals at our outlets. bah!

anyways back to wala's.. so ah ho and i were deciding what we were gonna drink and we decided on hoe and i looked ard and realise that they have the big 750ml bottles back! woooohooo! in all excitement i ordered 4 bots of it, being 1 for 1 we ended up with 8 bots and only 3 of us to finish it. oh gosh... when chums came at 11ish ah ho and i were only done with 5 bots. the moment we finished the 5th bot i felt sick already. met up with my fellow emo elmo cuz she was ard the area. anyways good for u that u've decided to stay off cigs but your reasoning is crap! lol. oh and i was damn sad shirlyn wasnt singing. some malay guy stood in for her cuz she's on holiday in melbourne and he had damn alot of actions while singing which ah ho totally detested. she said he looked like 'sun wu kong' incarnate? haha. so after the 3rd set we were left with 2 unopened bots which i asked the waitress what could we do about it and she was like u can take it away. which she put it in the ugliest plastic bag and i felt like a swine having to bring it out. oh wells... so the 2 bots are now with chums and she's gonna put it at her shop so we can go by and chill after work. cool..... am looking forward to that.

from one blog to another..

2007-11-24T14:47:00.000+08:00

dont feel like blogging about the past week at work cuz it has just been as sucky as its always been. but instead this entry will be about a friend's blog which i was looking at, it kinda like sparked some interest in me to wanna elaborate further on it?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
here are some references taken from her blog.

'Humans r contradicting, weak n watever shit u can tink of. They alwaz succumb to lust, temptation, greed, fame n materialism (trust me).'

'Coz im only human, its an ez excuse. Tis is my fate. don't probe, don't ask, don't question and juz mind your ur own business.'

'I wld say dat Im a practical person. I can be in e same job for a fuckin decade, juz like I can be in a r/s for a decade.'
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i agree on the part on humans. i think we all do and we are all victims ourselves at one time or another for giving in to lust, temptation, greed, fame, materialism. you'll probably have to be a saint or something to be able to curb giving in to such. thats very sad, its gonna cause the fall of all mankind. ok i know im exaggerating here. and yes dont we always say 'we're only human' when we get ourselves into some shit we try to get out of? this is something we cant retaliate against, like duh right unless u're really not human?! yea so we'll just continue blaming it on us being human, blame it on fate, blame it on a force stronger than us... the blame game. oz principle! dont we all at some point of our lives find it sucha drag like as if the world owes us something when in fact it doesnt? how our lives can always be better especially when we start comparing it to those we are better off than us? but have we tried comparing ourselves to those we arent doing better than us? NO. why cant we just be contented with what we have? why do we have all this mechanism in us that makes us want to have more than what we already do?

and lastly i can never be as practical as my friend. be in the same job for a decade? be in a r/s for a decade? I CANT, especially not with my present job. be in the same r/s for a decade? from the looks of it very soon i'd be able to take up the vow of celibacy? hahahaha cant believe i said that and tickled myself.

sheer stupidity and immense irresponsibility..

2007-11-20T00:13:00.000+08:00

and so the topic of my blog has once again been proven to me by the one. and here i am sitting here in utter disgust and in full contempt of the one. like i always say some ppl ought to be shot and on this fine day i found another one to add to my hit list. ppl on my hit list, thank ur lucky stars im not a sniper or all of u wld have been long dead and faded away into the past like how a cockroach is being stepped on and u dun even give two hoots abt it. BAH!

my sincere apologies to my honourable mimi who always has to listen to me nag and thereafter feel helpless and keep telling me to relax. im sure u can empathise with my frustration. sometimes i juz dunno wad to do, im sure u can understand how i feel? can u all please knock some sense into the thick numbskull of the one? and i still cant believe he's been promoted to senior. i promise u all i'd nv call FO and ask for a snr in future if thats the kinda snrs u all have. im sorry this may sound rude and yes its personal but i dont give a shit after the way he spoke to me this afternoon. yes, disregard me if u muz but to me u are NOTHING. and from now on i will only selectively choose to speak to the 5 of u remaining peeps, my groupies. the rest can all juz die for all i care.

~HELL HATH NO FURY LIKE A WOMAN SCORNED~

beautiful saturday..

2007-11-18T15:32:00.000+08:00

had fun on saturday... was supposed to go back to work to finish up some stuff but it didnt quite work out. i always plan to go back to work on saturdays but end of the day i keep putting it off. it juz shows how much i detest goin to work. *pukes* bad enough that i stayed at work till ard 11pm on friday.

so anyways lemme speak of my fun saturday. mum woke me up at ard 1130 to prepare and head out for lunch with my extended family members cuz one of my uncles is leaving for Doha next wk to work for 2yrs, to construct the airport there. kinda like a farewell lunch for him and at the same time to celebrate my grandpop's bday which is like a wk away. so they organised for lunch at a chinese restaurant at orchid country club, we always go there cuz apparantly the head chef there is my grandpop's 'disciple'. yea my grandpop's used to be a chef and he used to stay with my family when i was younger like in pri sch, maybe that explains why im obese cuz i grew up with unhealthy but super yummylicious food! haha. Zach was ard too and of cuz he was the centre of attraction cuz its been a very long while since we had sucha young kid amongst us. here are some pics we took....

'YUM SING!' we'll always use this stunt to cheat zach into drinking his water and it works all the time.. haha

Zach dancing... can u see how bored i am? i was actually wearing zach's hat. hahaha

mum and her siblings.. short of the uncle who's leaving for Doha. she has 4 siblings. and of cuz Zach and the aunt next to my mum are not her siblings la. -duh-

alright thats abt all the pics i have for the family gathering. after lunch went home to rest abit and then took a cab to meet suew, liah, norain, nickole at central for dinner. pasta waraku. again its nothing to shout abt. kinda overpriced too. no pics for this... shall wait for liah and norain to start posting the pics and then i'd grab it from them cuz they were the ones with the digicams and they practically took pics of everything! *rolls eyes* i never quite liked taking pics anyways. oh then after dinner we headed to cineleisure to watch 'beowulf' haha and we kept calling it BEO-WOLF when in fact its BEAR-WOLF but we had abit of time to waste before the show started so we had some drinks at a cafe on the 2nd flr of cine. dunno the name but they loan out board and card games so we borrowed uno. ha retard.. we only managed to complete 2 games within 45mins? and both games suew lost! and liah was the naggy one who hates me cuz i kept making her draw many many cards cuz she didnt have any red cards! wahahaha. so after that we proceeded for the movie but i didnt really enjoy it. to begin with animation is not my cuppa tea and the only person who looked real in the show was angelina jolie, like y am i not surprised. ha. liah had real difficulties trying to stay awake and she dozed off a couple of times.. tsk. anyways had fun with my girlies! and as always i miss those times we slogged and bitched at work! those were the days.... lol

unbearable..

2007-11-15T00:03:00.000+08:00

the days at work are really getting intolerable. chums mood at work seems to get worser by the day. think we all need a break. as in really break free and not be in the slightest way associated with the shithole we are in now. *sigh* felt sick today. in fact we all feel sick the moment we step foot into the shithole. the repulsive symptoms we suffer from. makes me nauseous. that aside...

watched the wizard of oz at work today.. its becuz of some oz principles course that we all have to go through. i kinda enjoyed it cuz it was a long long time ago since i watched it and i only remembered bits and pieces of it. cant say the same for the rest think most of the rest of the audience probably never watched it before. sometimes i feel glad for the stuff my mum exposed us to when we were kids. the kinda shows she let us watch and the songs we listened to. i feel she gave us the best and made sure we didnt miss out on anything good. chums like i always tell u i have good upbringing! :P

i took half day leave yday so that i could go queue up for the linkin park concert. bad move cuz i ended up only leaving work ard 6 didnt see the bloody point of taking leave when in the end i leave at ard the same time as i knock off. wasted half a day's leave due to another individual's incompetence and unhelpfulness. oh wells when skinny and i got there it was a lil before 7 there was already a long queue but somehow due to some reason we managed to cut the queue got an ok place to stand at. i dont think i'd ever buy standing tickets for any concert again. too old can't stand for long and hate rubbing and squeezing with smelly and sweaty ppl (esp the matts). *eeks* so the show started an hr late and only lasted 1.5hrs. overall i felt it was only an ok performance. nothing to scream abt. good experience but dont think i'd do it again. right skinny chum? -_-

getting lazier to blog..

2007-11-11T18:21:00.000+08:00

been feelin lazy to blog recently. even when i m bothered to log on most of the time im juz snooping ard trying to read my personal emails or im juz chatting over msn. dont really remember most of wad happened during the early wk. my recollection only begins from thurs onward... so i shall start from thurs..

thurs
damn happy cuz its PH and didnt have to go to work... spent most part of the day sleeping. had tix to go watch zhang hui mei concert. it wasnt too bad. we had comp tix becuz she was staying with us(theres a whole dramatic story to how the tix ended up with us but i dun quite wanna go thru it now cuz it'd piss me off) but the view was kinda restricted but cant complain. it was kinda like a ktv session for me cuz we sing quite abit of her songs durin our ktv outings and furthermore they had like lyrics flashin across the huge screens. had a gd time with chummy. as long as shes ard im happy. hahaha.. dUh.

fri
HORRIBLE day at work and i kinda realised everytime that fat piece of crap is on leave i'd be terribly pissed with him. may he die when i go on leave during dec. im so looking forward to it and i hope gg goes on leave too so he'd really really die and understand how i feel even tho i think i do very good passovers and dun leave a bad after-taste for ppl who take over my duties. my msn tagline was.. ''some ppl juz ought to DIE.. for a good cause' yea self-explanatory. moving along.. i rcvd a trunk call from my boss who's in hkg tellin me very subtly that i needed to stay for my group which was checking in past midnight. damn sad. i had to stay over at the hotel and the whole group check in saga ended at ard 3am and i had to get up the next morning at 730am to watch over the group breakfast. sigh..

sat
so i started off my day really early. at 730am... headed back to the room to sleep at 9+am... woke up again at 12nn to go back to work. thank goodness thru all this i had aL's company which really made cheered me up a lil. i mean its like disgusting having to go thru all this alone la and she so happened to need to work as long hrs as me (for her its fricking long hrs anytime anyday :x) i persuaded her to leave work at 5 with me to go meet bello at bishan so that i cld go get a haircut at my usual salon. surprisingly it wasnt crowded like usual.. being a sat. so i decided to colour my hair too. and the 2 poor girls had to wait for me la... heh. went to J8 for dinner at 'ding tai feng' and while we were walkin ard after that we all decided to go catch a movie even tho aL and i were like totally dead after only having a few hrs of sleep. so bello decided on watchin stardust, the showtime was like 0005hrs and when we bought the tix it was only 2200hrs meanin we had 2hrs to burn. aL wanted to 'repaint' her nails so we went to get nailpolish and we ended up at some void deck, with bello helpin aL to paint her nails.. so not my cuppa tea so i was sitting there reading on the 8days i bought to entertain myself. ok stardust is not too bad. watchable. very fairytale kinda show. had major problems forcing myself to stay awake thruout the show but i managed to. when the show finally ended i was like yawnin nonstop.... zipped home and knocked out shortly after.

sun
didnt do much today was catchin up on my sleep. feel like im coming down with a sore throat.. am feeling groggy too. shucks. alrights gonna find something eat... ciaos.

beer+food marathon...

2007-11-04T22:45:00.000+08:00

been feeling lazy to blog recently.. so lemme try to recap what happened for the past week. so juz skip the work week and head straight into the weekend... starting from thurs...

went to paul's on thurs cuz taxidoor had a dinner to attend, meaning chum could go out with us! heh.. it was funny as usual cuz bello was around.

fri.. didnt manage to accomplish much at work cuz we all went to another hotel for site inspection and spent a good half of the afternoon there. tried their cheesecake and omg it was so goooooood (is this a giveaway?). saw their refurbished rooms and their meeting facilities.. dont have much to say but maybe ccs shouldnt think so highly of themselves anymore? but they think otherwise.... oh wells.. its another one of those ideas i get whereby 'its me against the whole world'... headed to bello's house for the much-anticipated dinner, where i didnt manage to guess what main course we were gonna have. but before that we went to carrefour to buy booze cuz silly bello bought 18cans of carlsberg... and like WHO DRINKS CARLSBERG??! so we decided on hoegaarden. and al made us buy 2 pomelo's for bello's granny... urm like how they always say cannot go to ppl's house empty handed? haha.. bello's house is nice... very cosy. so we had mushroom soup, spaghetti with meatballs, mango pudding. yummy but had overdose of meatballs. and its ikea meatballs. nice. watched sound of music as we planned to but al and chums were battling to stay awake... and chums failed in battle... i'd love to post the pic of her sleepin but she'd kill me so i'd better not. heh. then we also had some drama cuz her granny wasnt home by like 2am. but ended up granny had abit to drink and i guess she forgot abt the time. so worrying! but she got home safe... thats all that matters!

sat... was supposed to go to work and do some work but i woke up feelin sick and tired of work so i decided not to go work. met chums and taxidoor at suntec for pepper lunch! like finally... yummys. after that we went to the car showrooms to check out which car to get. quite decided on mitsubish lancer. the older model. test drove both the old and new models. the new model looks nicer and fiercer but we felt its abit noisier too. but i guess the deciding factor was that the new EX model is like 8k more than the old model. but now daddy is giving me problems... i have a stinking feeling he's not serious abt gettin a car. *sigh* we shall see... so after checkin out the cars we went to ikea to walk ard and bello met us there. had dinner at the hawker ctr across the rd then taxidoor dropped us off at wala's. my comfort drinking place... shirlyn got a new haircut and it looks good on her.

ok i shall stop here... been having a horrible pounding headache for the whole day... i shld get more rest altho i've been already sleepin most part of today....

finally managed to catch up on some work today

2007-10-30T00:14:00.000+08:00

finally after rushing ard on fri and sat becuz of the dumbass group, kinda settled down today and managed to warm my lonely seat. had alot of shit left over from last wk.. cleared most of it today but there's still somemore left. hopefully i can lessen it in the next few days so that i can be doing more updated stuff. at the rate im going and if my boss finds out... im gonna be so dead but then again i know there'll always be someone more backdated and slower than me. so.... i dont really care.

my chummies met each other today and smally told me skinny juz got skinnier.. aye all the efforts i went thru to fatten her up before. gone... all down the drain. haha. my poor skinnier? she's been buzzing ard with her restaurant and stuff.. its like i havent seen her in the longest time. tsk. and skinny u'd better go with me to the linkin park concert... else, else... i also dunno wad i'd do. havent quite decided yet. hmmms.. maybe i'd go to ur restaurant and 'chai zhao pai'? u know like those kungfu flicks 'ti guan, chai zhao pai'! ok now im beginning to be a lil crappy. heh... i better log off and go stare at my room walls or something... ciaos.

'I started counting teardrops and at least a million fell
My eyes began to swell
And all my dreams were shattered
All at once

Ever since I met you
You're the only love I've known
And I can't forget you
So I must face it all alone

All at once
I'm drifting on a lonely sea
Wishing you'd come back to me
And that's all that matters now
All at once
I'm drifting on a lonely sea
Holding on to memories
And it hurts me more than you know
So much more than it shows
All at once..'

cant cry hard enough..

2007-10-28T02:34:00.000+08:00

i think my good friend who's named insomnia is here to stay with me.. through thick and thin. after countless bots of hoes' and resorting to puffing cigs outside my rm's window with the door closed, im mentally drained and physically strained yet im still not sleepy. its almost 3am and it doesnt help with sucha song playing.. and its true when i say 'my sanity hangs by a thread' and may i add its a very thin thread... God save my soul..

I'm gonna live my life
Like every day's the last
Without a simple good-bye
It all goes by so fast

And now that you're gone
I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

I'm gonna open my eyes
And see for the first time
I've let go of few like
A child letting go of his kite

There it goes up in the sky
There it goes beyond the clouds
For no reason why
I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

I'm gonna look back in vain
And see you standing there
When all that remains
Is just an empty chair

And now that you're gone
I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

There it goes, up in the sky
There it goes, beyond the clouds
For no reason why
I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

been a busy wk at work..

2007-10-28T00:14:00.000+08:00

realised i haven't had the time to log on at home to blog. looking back i used to do it so often. its amazing where i found the strength to log on after a long and sucky day at work and to blog abt it. oh wells.... lemme summarize my wk at work..... hmms.....

then again for the past wk i've been busy mainly because of the dumb artiste group. took up hell lot of my time to sort out their ever-so-often changes, so damn troublesome coordination with the various departments(and it didnt help that some particular dept was damn bloody UNHELPFUL), ever-demanding organisers where everyone gives different instructions and the best part of all they're all bloody cheapos-with low budgets and paying lousy rates. makes me wonder why i have to work so hard?!

decided to drop all my work yday so that i cld head to the FO chalet with the few nice ppl who bothered to wait awhile for me to finish up with my work. still dunno whether it was a gd or bad move for me to go but it doesnt matter anymore cuz the fact is that i went. felt quite out of place but it was still nice seeing all the buddies who braved countless storms with me in the past. those were the gd old days. im very happy for those who have moved on and i pray for those who havent that their day will come soon. left the chalet with a heavy heart that was filled with regret and guilt but i shan't elaborate on that..

in the past week i found out a piece of news that was kinda disheartening for me. i dont understand y there muz be politics at work and why i have to be subjected to it. dont understand why some ppl can be so evil? i dont believe i've done anything towards u. i did my part and served my purpose. why is it u have to always stick up like a sore thumb when things goes against u? honestly, at ur level u shld learn how to be more forgiving and learn how to let go when u have to. u're sucha sad bitch, pls get a life.

today's the longest Saturday ever i spent at work ever since i transferred to sales. yea it had to be the dumbass artiste group. to all those fans, i honestly dont understd wads all the commotion abt? they're all juz humans, except they may be slightly better lookin than the normal chaps u see on the streets? if i didnt remember wrongly i nv did idolise anyone in sucha way. thank goodness. if i ever had kids like that who'd spend unneccesarily to like charter a maxi cab to follow the idols ard or book a rm at like a few hundred bucks, i'd hit the living daylights outta them! and to think i had to be a human barricade.. some dumb girl was actually pushing me from behind and started screaming, i already had this horrible frickin pondin headache and i was like abt to like punch the next person who irritated me. so i turned ard and stared DAMN hard at her, thats when she moved back and stopped screaming. *sigh* teenage girls.. plain irritating. stayed ard till 10+pm.. now im with my bot of hoe, listening to sappy oldies mp3s.. all im missing is a ciggie. *sighhhhHHhhhhHhhhhhh*

been a good wkend..

2007-10-21T23:11:00.000+08:00

as all of u know the past week at work has been a horrendous one for me.. the wkend kinda made up for it. sweetened the bad after-taste slightly.

went back to work on sat for a few hrs to clear up ABIT of work(i expected myself to do more but oh well). made a massage appt (felt like i really needed it so bad) it felt so good. then after that went shoppin ard orchard.. retail therapy. spent close to 300bucks. a good half of it i spent at GAP. still cant believe how much they mark up the prices. i think at those factory outlets in US u can get the stuff there at like 1/3 of wad we pay here. dammitz. but i've always liked GAP and since i dont seem to be going to US anytime soon, i'd juz have to fork out such money. *grumbles*

crabbie woke me up with a call this morning. time to wake up for sunday brunch! i shall name the ppl like how "i" did, in secret agent codes. chums i suppose only u'd understand then. haha. so "r+n" were supposed to pick me up and gimme a ride but they were so late and i muz've smoked half my life away. oh btw i went to buy ciggies and the uncle thought i was 16. omg like can someone juz enlighten the poor old man?! or maybe he juz needs a pair of glasses. tsk. anyways i was quite hungry but by the time we got to hyatt i kinda lost the hunger. so "i, y+d" were already there, i mean obviously cuz "r+n" were really late(sorry i cant stop harping on the late part cuz i was hungry and standing for like a good 30mins). so "i" decided to bring me on a tour cuz it was my first time there for brunch. its so her to do that. and then after that she went crazy and refused to believe that it was my first time there. like huh after she brought me on the tour and everything?! anyways the food was good, the company was even better and plus champagne.. i absolutely have no complaints. ohhh the best part was i didnt have to pay cuz its supposed to be a belated bday treat from "i"!! wooohoooooo $118/pax. thats no joke lor. thanks "i"! *muaks* i still love u even tho u call me a lil monkey and always nag at us... wahahahahaha luckily she doesnt read my blog. :P

oh drats.. i better be gettin to bed soon cuz its back to work in a few hrs time. bleh.

i was watching telly earlier and heard this song which i havent heard in a long time. many memories came flashing back.. *sigh*

And I love you so - Don McLean

'And I love you so
The people ask me how
How I've lived till now
I tell them I don't know

I guess they understand
How lonely life has been
But life began again
The day you took my hand

And yes, I know how lonely life can be
The shadows follow me and the night won't set me free
But I don't let the evening get me down
Now that you're around me

And you love me, too
Your thoughts are just for me
You set my spirit free
I'm happy that you do

The book of life is brief
And once a page is read
All but love is dead
That is my belief

And yes, I know how loveless life can be
The shadows follow me and the night won't set me free
But I don't let the evening bring me down
Now that you're around me

And I love you so
The people ask me how
How I've lived till now
I tell them I don't know..........'

the day where i can finally take no more..

2007-10-17T22:31:00.000+08:00

today has been by far the most overwhelming and horrid day at work. i know how i have previously blogged abt 'the worst days' today is a new milestone to that description. neverending leads, irritating bookers who try to squeeze u off everything they can, endless phonecalls, emails that come in like as if someone is mass spamming ur mailbox and fucking irritating colleagues that think i sit ard the whole day waitin for them to give me stuff to do! cant they juz fucking do their own work and leave me alone juz like how i leave them alone??!

don't fucking push me anymore. i don't wanna come to a day where i turn abusive. and i can honestly say im not far from reaching there. FUCK U ALL... and im sure u know who u are.

'Who will save your soul if you won't save your own?
Some are walking, some are talking, some are stalking their kill..'

im a retard still wishing my weekends wld stretch abit longer...

2007-10-14T23:14:00.000+08:00

i'd really like to know who came up with the screwed up logic that we have to work 5 days and only get 2 days off?! i mean its totally out of proportions!! and the work week drags on like there's no tmr but the 2 off days goes by with juz like a blink of the eye. like wassup man?!!! oh well all this complaining and whining is not gonna make my wkend any longer so im juz gonna give up.. but i still dont buy the whole crap!! bah!

ok lets talk abt how my wkend went. actually lemme juz start from friday evening cuz there's a story to continue from there. was planning to work late on friday so headed down to the canteen with al and bello to grab some dinner before we head back to work. then we were chattin in the canteen and i was tellin them how my aunt irritated my guy cousin who's like 29yrs old. there was once he went clubbing and reached home ard 3am so shortly after reaching home he went into his rm closed the door and was changin and my aunt starting knockin on his door to ask where he went. thank goodness my mum doesnt wake up in the middle of the night to ask me such crap. and then in the morning my aunt woke my cousin up at like 9am to have breakfast when she knew that he only got home at 3am.. like man... how evil! then i was like my mum wld never do that to me cuz she cant be bothered, which is a good thing. man... was i wrong! as u all know i've been suffering from insomnia recently so i stayed up till ard 5am rewatchin kill bill 1+2. and then *drum rolls* my mum woke me up at 9am to have breakfast with her!! she actually went specially to the market to buy my favourite food... aww its sucha nice gesture but u wun really be appreciative if u were to be dragged outta bed after only sleepin for 4hrs?! i shld nv have made fun of my cuzzie... im sorry! so after brekkie read the whole stack of papers. the papers were really thick for this sat. i read it till abt 12nn but in btwn i was watchin telly too la. felt tired after that and i went to take a nap.. but ended up sleepin till ard 5pm. oops there goes a gd part of my saturday. met al and bello to go wala's. i missed shirlyn and the unxpected so much, its good hearin them again. they play like my comfort music but sometimes i dun like the songs they play but heck shirlyn sings pretty well so it makes up for it. and not to mention we had chix wings again! i think the standard of the wings there is droppin drastically tho. they shld start doing something abt it.. like maybe change the oil? lol. anyways the whole time bello was like complainin abt her butt and how it hurts. we were not even thru the 1st set and she started whining already. gosh. bello i think the next time we're goin there u better like bring a cushion along or something. haha

moving along... today liah invited us to her place becuz of hari raya but only emily and i went. it was ok. liah stop being so apologetic abt not being a good host la. u were fine. and we were entertaining ourselves. hee. i was driving my bro's car today.. its a nice feelin to drive. i have many friends telling me they prefer to be driven than drive, i think i prefer to drive than to be driven. i like the feelin of being behind the wheel and i think i drive damn well. it'd be a pity for the roads to be less of a driver like me. lol. dropped emily off at conrad cuz she needed to pick something up then headed home to pick mummy to go to hv to shop ard and have dinner.. thats abt all i did for the wkend. how pathetic.

its back to work in another 8hrs time! *cries* im glad fat boy is gonna be back. and so the shit goes back to him.. i dun care!!

annoyed, irritated and frustrated.

2007-10-10T23:57:00.000+08:00

i had a damn terrible day at work today. its unbelievable how much crap i was put thru. feel my tolerance level has gone up by leaps and bounds. given the past i'd be slamming anything i get get my hands on & spewing vulgarities like how an athelete runs a marathon.

i simply detest my job now. i refuse to accept y i have to pick up after this particular individual. im not paid to, its not within my job descrip to. its juz not fair and when i say its not fair dun gimme the crap that nothing in this world is fair. thats fucking bull! I DONT BUY IT!

i wanna leave but with AWS juz ard the corner, its like i can almost reach it if i juz stretched, its juz not worth it to leave at this point. and if i can stay to get AWS then bonus will also come really soon.. *sigh* i'd juz have to grit my teeth and hang in there... i feel like crying, this is really really bad.

Chummy can we really start planning towards leaving? pleaseeeeeeeee? take it as im begging u? -_-

havent been sleeping well..

2007-10-09T23:23:00.000+08:00

the bouts of insomnia is slowly creeping back into my life. been a long while but they decided to revisit me? dont feel tired even into the wee hours of the morning but when its abt time to get up for work i feel like i'd do anything to juz laze for another 5mins in bed. ok maybe the waking up part has nothing to do with the insomnia but instead that i dread work that much. *sighs*

should i rely on pills, alcohol or drugs(if i can get my hands on any that is). ahhh wells life's a bitch, and then i die.

'if heaven calls, i'm coming too
just like you said, you leave my life, i'm better off dead

now the drugs don't work
they just make me worse
but i know i'll see your face again...'

oh juz to clarify things to edz and vonz, im no poet. most of the stuff that i post on my blogs are either song lyrics or stuff written by other ppl. i read alot into songs and stuff and dunno why recently everything i come across seems to be so meaningful or maybe its juz me being sensitive and emotional..

rainy monday

2007-10-08T23:46:00.000+08:00

havent been feelin really good past few days. can feel like im almost gonna fall very sick but am still battling it with the medicine i pop before headin off to bed every night.

doesnt really help that chums is feeling down too. im kinda upset that there's nothing much i can do to bring her out of what she's feelin right now. i really feel for her. i've gotten to a point whereby i feel sad when she's sad too. so emo right? chums.. thats how much u mean to me wor. i seldom ever feel so much for others. lol

'Smile though your heart is aching;
Smile even though it's breaking.
When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by.
If you smile through your fear and sorrow,
Smile and maybe tomorrow,
You'll see the sun come shining through for you.

Light up your face with gladness,
Hide every trace of sadness.
Although a tear may be ever so near,
That's the time you must keep on trying,
Smile, what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile,
If you just smile.

That's the time you must keep on trying,
Smile, what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile'

mildly irritated..

2007-10-07T22:54:00.000+08:00

'at least you were frank about it now. thanks.'

whats that supposed to mean? i was never hiding anything to begin with. juz cuz somewhere along the way u picked up the wrong signals and chose to believe things ur way doesnt mean its my fault right? come on.. dont be so petty.

'We read the world wrong and say that it deceives us.'

nothing much, havent done much and its back to work tmr. dammitz.

2007-10-07T21:42:00.001+08:00

the blog title says it all.. dun have much to blog abt nowadays also. life is dull and boring. its sleep, work, eat and occasionally drink. thats abt all.

For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate,
A time for war, and a time for peace.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

coming down with a cold

2007-10-03T22:31:00.000+08:00

didn't sleep well last night becuz i was coughing the whole night. woke up this morning with my throat feeling super uncomfortable. coughed a big blob of phlegm out. eeeewwwwwwww. then my nose feels runny, throat feels sore and i feel like im coming down with a fever. hate getting sick. esp when i know that taking a day off is juz gonna kill me with more work when i eventually go back to my little messy corner. *sigh*

had dinner with chums, taxidoor and irene becuz irene's date cancelled on her and she juz happened to ask us if we were available for dinner and chum's still owed her a treat for her bday? so i juz happily tagged along. thanks irene for initiating the dinner, thanks chummy for letting me tag along for the free dinner and the ride home, thanks taxidoor for paying for the dinner? hahaha

'I wanted a perfect ending. now i've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity.'

sleepy days..

2007-10-02T22:46:00.000+08:00

this is gonna be a short one because im feeling really tired. juz swung by to check on my emails and thought at the same time i'd juz put something down here. past few days i've juz been feelin really lethargic. the days seem to draggggg on while at work. im getting really sick of it. i dont think i've ever been so sick of work before. how???! how am i gonna survive till i get my fricking well-deserved bonus!!

these days im juz not doing much anymore. still tryin to find the motivation to cut down on my food and ciggie intake. *sigh* alright i shall head off to bed now or it'd juz be another fucking draggy day at work tmr... dammitz.

'Someone to love
Someone to touch
Someone to hold
Someone to know
Someone to trust'

is it that hard to find someone that fulfils the above and be reciprocal towards it?

barely survived an ah fun's injury prone day..

2007-09-29T22:40:00.000+08:00

juz got back from the 2d1n teambuilding we had in JB. overall it was fun other then the fact that i suffered alot of injuries and my whole body was aching. damn suay. shall update on that slightly later when i get some pics from chummy.

had a few drinks with ftee and tg juz after gettin back into s'pore. nic joined us after she was done with work. decided not to drink anymore as we were all exhausted. went for a quick dinner at qiji and headed back home. after i got home, dunno y but i had weird thoughts over something. its not like i drank alot and i felt pretty awake, i was merely physically drained.

decided to go for a walk to clear my head. i realised i can almost think along the frequency of a person who's suicidal but its not like i am suicidal. but its scary. my personal life hasnt been all that great recently. maybe thats y i've been having these crazy thoughts. i imagine abt things that i know will nv happen but it appears seemingly real like as if it juz might happen.. this is totally not doing me any good. im afraid i might juz blurt out these crazy thoughts of mine which will totally upset my norm lifestyle.. to begin with do i even lead a norm lifestyle? with all that said, pls dun come asking me wad i was thinkin abt. like chummy says 'if i tell u, i'd have to kill u' and i dun wish to be a murderer so pls dun ask me..

'first time I looked in ur eyes I knew, there was something special inside of you
you awaken my passion and my curiousity
you were so sincere I knew you'd be there for me

you gave me joy that I never knew
you were sent here to love me cuz I needed you
you helped me get through the worst times in my life

you shared my sadness, my pain, my stride
whenever I dream the impossible dreams
you assured me that they would come true
you stayed in my corner no matter what life could bring
and I pledge my love to u

just like the rain falling to the ground
you washed away my frowns and turned my life around
you made everything good in my life that was bad
you're the greatest friend that I ever had
I want you to be right here beside me forever and a day

for you are my strength, you are my future
and I need you here to stay

what.. what can I give you
in return for the hope that you've given me
just ask and, whatever you want it will be, it will be

you are the piece of the puzzle I need
to make my life full length complete
I love you so and thanks for being my best friend..'

something to ponder on.. do you have such friends? hmmmms...

dun think i ever wanna celebrate my birthday again. no dinners, no cakes and most importantly no singing of the bday song! faints

2007-09-25T00:04:00.000+08:00

and so i thought i could escape the whole birthday celebration thingy, boy was i wrong. met my whole family yday to go pay respects to my late grandpa, he passed away a few days after me bday. then my aunt planned to go dinner at some chinese restaurant at thomson plaza thereafter. i thought everyone forgot abt my bday, i was so so wrong. i felt loved but at the same time, i wished they had forgotten abt it. i wasnt up to the whole celebration thingy, juz wanted quiet and peaceful one.

luckily i had another not so close aunt who's bday was a few days earlier than mine and so i had someone to go thru all the embarrassing moments with. *phew* shall talk abt that slightly later. the food at the restaurant was pretty good but there were a few hiccups here and there, i was feeling nice then like as if i had a halo above my head therefore i didnt kick up a big fuss. there were a few things i was quite
impressed with tho.. there was this steamed prawn dish and they actually offered to de-shell it. at first i thought i heard wrongly but my cousins sitting next to me were like 'did u juz hear wad i did, like de-shell the prawns?' haha and de-shell it they did! very quickly and nicely... the heads of the prawns were still fully attached!!

and then came a venison dish.. it was yummy and i was again impressed with the presentation of the dish...

and then the dinner ended... and my aunt bought a cake. like awwww man. so we had to go thru all the rites of singing the birthday song and me being totally embarrassed cuz everyone in the restaurant was like staring. i really felt like hiding under the table. well for all that embarrassment i got quite a few red packets so i shan't complain. it was a fair exchange? haha.

wala's again..

2007-09-23T13:31:00.000+08:00

so i left off yday sayin i had to zip off to wala's. met a friend there lucky we made it in time to get a decent table and seats. its crazy the band starts at ard 10 and by 9 all the seats are taken up and if u cant find seats my advice wld be juz to leave and find somewhere else unless u can survive standing for the rest of the night. another thing is the time they end their 1 for 1 is at 9 maybe thats y the bloody crowd packs in early.. duhhhHh.

so i had my usual 2 rounds of hoegaarden. i juz wish they have the big 750ml bottles back soon. its much more worth it then drinkin the 330ml bottles now. bleh! jill suggested to have wings and i was like cool since i havent had it in a long time. but we had a difficult time finishin it off. therefore im impressed with ah ho cuz she can wipe out the wings.. *pukes*

skinny chummy dropped by with her moley guy friend. haha :P lucky i was guarding the 2 extra stools i had. haha. kept telling her not to go st james cuz she's been there almost every wk i think for abt a month already although she says its only been 2 wks. tsk. then they ordered another portion of wings which made me sick even by looking at it. ohh ohh another thing chummy and i kept thinkin back abt that 1 time smally chummy was with us at wala's. think that was the fun-nest time we had at wala's. cuz there was ah ho, her friend (which skinny chummy brought up yday and we realised we didnt rem her name, hee.. sorry!), skinny and smally chummy, taxi door and myself. hope we can do it sometime again!

oh darn its back to work tmr... *sigh* dread the work but am looking forward to see smally chummy... missed her on friday. wonder if she has stuff to update me on for friday cuz i wasnt at work? hmmmms....

moving on from mid to late twenties... groans

2007-09-22T19:46:00.001+08:00

so here i am past a quarter of a century old.. have nothing to my name nor a career to boast about. this totally sucks. am i being struck by the mid-life crisis? when u realised u've been in this world for so fricking long yet u have yet to acheive anything? actually i dun really care... let me juz lead my life a day at a time.

so moving on.... oh i mentioned in my previous entry that i'd talk abt the pressies i rcvd. chummy skinny & smally, aw, tg, al & crabbie shared to get me a new wallet. cuz chummy smally asked me wad i wanted and i told her i needed a new wallet. my old money clippy wallet was dying on me. so she said that they cant afford a mont blanc becuz over budget which i was totally cool abt it. as long as they dun get me some funny-lookin, odd-coloured wallet. ended up they got me a mont blanc!!! then i was askin chummy smally isnt it over budget then she said she'd top up the rest! *sniffs* so touched. then norain sprung me a surprise too. i came back from a site inspection and found a box of chocs on my table with a lil note from norain and she came by shortly after to gimme a big hug! so sweet right??! then grace and michelle presented me with another $150 mont blanc vchr cuz i told them i wanted a name card holder. haha now i will have a full range of mont blanc stuff. wallet, namecard holder, key pouch and a pen but in an ugly green. cant complain tho. heh

got back from batam this morning. had a good massage there, it felt so good. fell asleep while tanning and jumped up when the heat finally got to me and now my face+nose hurts like hell. it was like my most interesting trip to batam. made 2 new friends while i was there. we got to know the f&b mgr who used to work in sg and we made friends with a fellow diner while having dinner by the teppanyaki grill.. we were like the only patrons there cuz it was like the rest of the ppl stayin in the hotel decided to have buffet and it was very noisy. we had to waste some money to eat teppanyaki to get away from the crowd. think the dinner check muz've came up to abt $200 cuz we had quite alot of warm sake. ended up this new friend we made insisted he settle the bill for us. he's a damn interesting guy. born in sg, studied in us, living in hkg but works all over the place. he's into shippin, marine engin so happened that he docked his ship for repairs in batam. he left us his namecard and mobile number so that if we ever go to hkg we can give him a call and he'd bring us ard. so nice right? but we shld nv be so trusting towards ppl...

ok thats abt all i need to get ready for wala's.... cheerios!

this was supposed to be yday's blog entry

2007-09-19T20:52:00.000+08:00

on our way back from work last night in chummy's car last night she was saying she'd be blogging abt one of our sales ppl whom during morning meeting pronounced warner brothers as warner blooders. hahaha. i almost wanted to die and chummy thought she was the only one who realised it when there i was hard trying hard to contain my laughter and not burst out laughin like an idiot.

then i told chums i wld blog abt another colleague that we have who's a fortune teller??! she knows the future...! when she reads the morning reports instead of reading it as last night's figures or last night's no shows she reads it as the present day's figures! and mind u she has been corrected before.... and to think she's a SSM... dear dear me. fake bitch.

so yday i rcvd a rare call.. from emily. she ordered me to go ktv with the rest of the FO ppl. feelin ok i decided to go.. think it was a bad move. stayed on till ard 5. had abit to drink and found out something abt my buddy that left me abit disappointed. felt that the situation cld be handled a lil better? but oh wells.. its not fair to pass judgement like that cuz when u're caught in a situation like that urself u'd not be able to think very well too. -shrugs- hope she gets past this in the nicest way possible and also to all the parties involved.

and so i woke up late even tho nick gave me a wuc on time cuz i went back to sleep. got up at like 845 and i was like oh shit! then i started puking and had abit of diarrhoea, felt weak and wobbly all over yet i still decided to go to work cuz i had alot of work left off from the day before. didnt manage to do much but didnt wanna take mc also cuz kept feeling its only a few more hrs to endure... boy was i wrong. it was damn painful waitin till 640. left on the dot! and here i am back home blogging. alrights i shall head off to bed. really have alot of work to finish up tmr.... gd nights to all....

shall blog abt the 1st bday pressie i rcvd this yr in my next entry..........~<|:o)

that used to be my playground..

2007-09-17T22:23:00.000+08:00

was chatting with ah yin earlier this afternoon sometime after lunch.. cuz i was feeling sleepy and didnt wanna work too hard on a monday cuz theres still like 4 long days to go before the workweek ends. BAH! its a bloody torturous cycle...

anyways as i was saying i was chattin with ah yin and she was apologising to me for having abruptly ending a conversation we were having the night before cuz she was at work and needed to log off to prepare for the electricity shut off, they call it something like high tension shut down? some crap that they do every now and then to test that all our backup resources are intact juz in case something really happens. then we started reminiscing abt the old times.....

how it used to be so fun going thru all those crap with our buddies. it really makes alot of difference working with the ppl u like and get along with. and so ah yin was saying she remembered the previous time she was on night shift on high tension shut down together with nick.. i remember i was also ever on midnight once on hi tension but i cant remember who i was working with, muz've been someone who didnt matter much! ha. but well i remember those times when i was on shift and fidelio was like down for the whole morning.. i was on shift with jasper and both of us had to redo all our checkout transactions which was like a whole fricking drawer full. and also there was once we had waitboxes all the way till like 9pm. that was my longest morning shift, it ended at ard 11pm. that was when shimin was still ard and jean herself was monitoring the rm situation.

that was all good fun. its sad that such history will never repeat itself. i muz say all that groomed us into the talented ppl that we all are now! the present kiddos have a long way to go before they'd ever be like us. *evil grin* lol

oh another thing.. chummy was being irritating today. bleh! last thursday while we were at suntec walkin ard after lunch i told her i felt like buying a 'lil piggy' to munch on. u know those lil cute thangs in a plastic basket that they sell during mid-autumn festival? she refused to lemme buy it cuz i was already munchin on a pretzel and having my honey green pearl tea. she went to buy like 6 'BIG PIGGIES' during the weekend and she refused to let me share it with anyone else. its like punishment to me for being greedy?! all i wanted was a lil bit of my childhood.. *sniffs* and the worst thing is the big piggies didnt even come in the cute baskets, that was the whole point of eating that fuckin piece of flour?! and now i still have like 4 big piggies to go...... *groans*

but chummy no matter how u torture me.. im still glad for having u ard. sounds abit sadist eh? but really, i dunno wad i'd be without u ard. i need uuuuuuuuuu.. to answer my silly qns abt work, to send me home after work!, to have lunch and fetch water tog with me, to listen to me sing all the weird songs that ppl dun normally sing(n u actually know the songs too!), to pek zao with, to listen to me ngam ngam cham cham only to have me rebutt u that u gg yy and most importantly to slap my back to my senses when i lose track of where im headin towards... thank u. i love u. *muah!*

and it comes tumbling down..

2007-09-16T23:13:00.000+08:00

ever had the feeling that everything seems to be finally moving on fine for you? after so long.. after all the shit u had been put thru. its like u finally get to see the sunshine after braving the rain... but all thats not meant to be. u juz need 1 little setback to bring u back to where u started off from. when others say life is very fragile im beginning to think that happiness is very fragile too. theres only a very thin line that seperates happiness from sadness. and with that 1 little setback i've been kicked back into the region of sadness and darkness.

chummy u are right. i didnt need that person back in my life. it was a mistake to even let that person creep back into my life. and so now im suffering the repercussions of my dumbness. this time i really want out... and nothing more to do with that person...

and here i am again building up my new defences and having to work towards being happy... its sucha chore.

"How do I, say goodbye, to what we had?
The good times that made us laugh, always come back,
I thought we'd get, to see forever,
But forever's gone away,"

Good riddance i might say?

guest appearance...

2007-09-16T17:13:00.000+08:00

headed back to wala's again yday.. its like a weekly affair thingy. but i really prefer sitting down having a few drinks and a live band to keep u entertained rather than going clubbing... feel im too old for clubbing. it makes my body ache a whole lot for the next few days and it leaves my ears buzzing for the next day which is highly irritating.

and i had the company of 2 girls.. 1 of which that has disappeared for like the longest time. it was nice meeting her again. =) im gonna post a pic of them which i took last night even tho i know 1 of them will come after my blood cuz she looks white in the pic... aiya its juz the flash and cuz u have make up on but bear doesnt :P

well... hope we'd have many more outings of such before bear disappears again? cheerios!

soon to be smoke free?

2007-09-13T22:48:00.000+08:00

its been 2 days since i last took a puff. think its been easier this time as compared to all my previous attempts, its not really considered as attempts because i really did stop smoking for quite some time before succumbing back into the habit again. i remember clearly i used to suffer from horrible withdrawal symptoms like runny nose, watery eyes, feeling lousy the whole day and every little thing that went wrong would make me 'snap' and was just easily irritated. now i suffer from none of those but instead i have alot of craving for different kinds of food and im perpetually looking for stuff to snack on. abit like how pregnant woman behave? although im not quite sure cuz i havent really been through pregnancy??

u all muz be thinking y i've suddenly decided to quit smoking? honestly im not quite sure myself i juz thought its about time i stopped or i'd never get down to doing it? i find it amazing myself that im finally beginning to think straight? haha. it really takes massive amt of determination in not succumbing to temptation. picking up a ciggie is really easy but try having a ciggie put in front of u and not having to pick it up... its like HELL.

so now the plan is to quit smoking altogether. and smally chummy stop smoking in front of me, its abt time u quit too! dun gimme the crap abt quitting next yr! *faints* after i stop smoking and which by then i'd have put on hell lotta weight becuz of the snacking, i will need to start planning a regular exercise regime. that is of course provided if i keep to it! well if i can quit smoking i dont see y i cant be determined to lose all the excess baggage! pls wish me luck..

check this song and mtv out..

2007-09-11T23:09:00.000+08:00

梁汉文 + 杨千嬅 - 滚

i really like this song and mtv.. hope that u all are able to view it... today was rather uninteresting cept we 3 chummies finally met up to have lunch together. then there was some drama cuz we bumped into someone we were hoping not to bump into becuz i had to lieeeee to get her out of the way so that the 3 of us chummies cld enjoy lunch together-gether. oh wells.. then chummy #1 and i came up with names for each other... its skinny+funny+smally. go guess who's who. lol. left work slightly later than usual becuz TC made me stay to do something and i was NOT to go home until i had it completed. hmpf! but we still made it in time to koufu to satisfy chummy #2's craving for ban mian. had a long wait for cab to go home.. ended up calling all the nonsense cab operators until we got one. and i was like feeling tired. tsk tsk.. so much for efficient public transportation in s'pore. when u need it most it fails on u. *spits*

lazy days...

2007-09-10T22:50:00.000+08:00

its been quite a few days since i got down to blogging. wkends now are purely for drinking, chilling and staying out till late which explains y i nv have the time to blog about my interesting wkends? haha like real. ok lets backtrack abit... i think i left off from last thursday? i shall start from thursday anyway cuz i cant think back any further than that!

THursday
went to MOS with nickers and ah yin. there were 2 others who were supposed to go but somehow didnt turn up. well its alright, had silly fun with these 2 buddies of mine. had a couple of weird incidents too but i shan't touch on that.

FRiday
after like 2hrs of rest, headed off to work. was pretty ok and alive until i had to go outdoors for a couple of sales calls. think the oh-so-hot weather killed me. went back to the office and started to malfunction shortly after. chummy warned me big big time not to go clubbing the night before if i had to work the next day cuz she says im not gettin any younger, think she's afraid i might juz drop dead and die?? lol so after work we went to our fav n most convenient watering-hole, paul's. quite a turn out only missing my other chums. even mr gopal came! wld have been more fun if i was more 'alive'... haha

SAturday
decided to go for a haircut before going to meet chums for dinner. aye it took so darn long, thats the thing abt being off on wkends like everyone else... sighs. dropped chums a msg to tell her i might be slightly late cuz i was at the hairdresser's and she replied 'no worries but you really didnt have to get your hair set just for this date..' i was laughing so hard i nearly died and everyone ard me thought i was CRAZY. oh wells thats my chums and thats y i love her so much, so full of shit. had dinner at food republic in wisma then headed over to emerald hill no. 5 cuz chums was supposed to do some mystery shopping for her friend for their services. got kinda bored so we headed back down to wala wala's...

SUnday
had lunch with m at taka's coffeeclub. its been awhile since i last went there. had my regular ceasar salad with rosemary chicken. tasted as good as before maybe even better? booked tickets to watch no reservations at cine. i like that show. its a no-brainer and kinda predictable but i personally feel its a rather suitable movie to catch on a wkend when u dont really feel like reading too much into the plots and stuff? and its the lovey dovey awwwwwwww kinda movie that one will definitely like! after the movie shopped ard abit and can u all believe it, i actually thought of helmi while i was in G2000 gazing at an array of neckties. reminded me of helmi and how i didnt quite like his tie at work :P so i decided to buy him ties! got m to pick out a few ties and i narrowed it down to the 2 i finally chose. but of cuz i didnt get them from G2000 cuz its kinda pricey. hee. anyways helmi... hope u like them and u muz really wear them hor!!!!!! or i'll boycott u too at work!!

"unlimited power"?

2007-09-04T23:08:00.000+08:00

didnt work today and almost the whole sales team has to go down to expo to attend some 'motivational cum inspirational' talk by the 'world-famous' anthony robbins, stephen pierce and allan pease. given normal circumstances i wld be very happy if i didnt have to work but it was sucha torture keeping myself awake and fighting the hunger for most part of the seminar that i really thought i'd be better off at work. oh btw thankfully chummy was driving or it'd be sucha hassle travelling there!

the talk started off with allan pease, i think of all the 3 speakers he was the only one who made sense. analysed alot on human behaviour and such. pretty interesting. his part went on for abt 2hrs before we headed off for like a 20mins break. everything ard was so crowded we decided to stay put and luckily for me i rushed out in the morning to buy some rations to tide us over.

next up was anthony robbins himself. he's huge... as in like really bigggg sized. and he was so full of crap. dont understand y everyone felt so entertained. i felt awkward like as if we were in some cheesy church congregation. reminded me of the times when i used to patronise this church that alot of youths go to and 1 of the pastors ended up becoming a pop star.. *shudders* it wasnt too gd an experience for me. similarties between the two... 1) in church we'd always raise our hands and say 'hallelujah', in this seminar he made everyone raise they hands and say 'aye'. 2) in a charismatic church they always make u stand and sing along and wave ur hands ard frantically, in this seminar same lor keep makin us stand and jump and hop and wriggle to the music. 3) in church the pastor wld say the sinners' prayer and we'd repeat after him, in this seminar he made us chant some dumb verse after him over and over again, i thought they sounded like some cult! this guy spoke for abt 3.5hrs before we breaked for lunch. and again we didnt bother to go out to get anything cuz there were too many ppl ard. got AW to da bao nasi lemak from qiji. it was like the most satisfying nasi lemak i had ever had.

the last part came stephen pierce... this guy was the WORST of the 3. intolerably boring! he's like a multi-millionaire.. and so thats wad he says.. he was trying to like 'teach' us his methods to earn money over the internet. being an IT idiot if i cld close my ears im sure they'd auto fold inwards and juz not listen to him at all. gosh... he was so boring we left half way thru to go to the john little sale juz 2 halls away from us and i spent like $50+ buying toiletries and munchies. haha. we tahan until abt 6pm and by then more then a good half of the people had already left. and so this pierce guy started his sales pitch and, all askin ppl to buy his stuff. he was like selling a membership card for $9,887 and some package for $47,587!!!! thats ALOT of money dude... but im quite sure there muz have been crazy or ppl who r too rich who took them up. geeeeee... and so we left shortly after. whole day wasted juz like that. i left there, still uninspired/unmotivated/unimpressed.. or issit juz me?? i'll nv wanna go to such things again.. dun understd how come the rest of the people there seemed so enthusiastic and they all looked like they left as better people? hmmmms...

we left expo ard 630 and headed to bedok for 'bar chor mee' woooohooooo.. its been awhile since i last had that, if chummy didnt mention abt it i'd nv have thought of goin there. heh we had bar chor mee, carrot cake and chicken wings for dinner. YUMMY! i muz thank chummy for bringing me ard today and entertaining me during my most boring hour... hahahaaaaaaaaa

i cant believe i missed blogging abt last friday..

2007-09-02T22:20:00.000+08:00

i was juz reading chummy's blog then realised that i totally missed out mentioning abt friday... haha. anyways we left work rather early considering i still had alot left to do. well there's always monday to complete it. i cant really be bothered anymore. met up with an ex-colleague whom its a pity i didnt get to work under her. the other chum's was supposed to come too but oh wells she cldnt make it. ah dot came along too. she's damn funny lo. she can be the script-writer, director and actress all at the same time. full of crap.

and so we were gossiping over our beers at paulaner's as usual. its like a weekly affair thingy. and all our gossip mainly revolved ard 1 person, she must've been sneezing her nose off. :x great way to chill out. chummy can we like do this every week, can u cheat taxidoor into signing a permanent agreement? heehee

moving on to today.. didnt do much. woke up and glued myself to the telly to catch up on the drama serial on forensic stuff cuz they rerun the whole wk's episodes on sundays. after that i glued myself to the computer. felt fat so decided to go for a jog.. i actually got down to doing it, cant believe it! went for an hr but out of that hr half the time i was walkin cuz i was so FRICKING breathless. best part all those ppl who walked past me and were smoking... wa lao i wanted to rob them off their cigs. but i supposed it was due to smoking which contributed to my breathlessness. i need to exercise MORE, smoke less and eventually QUIT and eat alot LESSER! im contemplating to take up a gym membership again but i dun want history to repeat itself. once upon a time i ever joined and paid them mthly subscription for a yr but within that yr i patronised them less than 10times. haha. if i dun go its a bloody waste of money. better think carefully... again it boils down to how determined i am in losing weight before i burst and die from obesity........ *tsk*

Have a listen to this..

2007-09-02T15:55:00.001+08:00

梁漢文楊千嬅 - 滾
quite like this song.. very dramatic, juz like how life is.. wanted to post the youtube mtv video but keep gettin error msgs... *tsk*

i shld think it was an eventful saturday?

2007-09-02T02:03:00.000+08:00

made plans to meet up with her today. its been awhile. went for a massage.. it felt sooo good. after that we headed to lido for expensive japanese food. felt i had abit to spend becuz of the backpay increment. after that rushed over to taka to buy myself a new pair of trackies using the taka vchrs i had. not too bad la only had to top up $20 for a pair of reeboks. rushed back to lido to catch ratatouille. it was pretty good. i thought the rat looked cute?! but there were hell lotta kids in the cinema. every now and then some kid wld burst out crying... irritating.

after the movie had to once again rush to marina square for granny's 84th bday dinner, we parted ways at MS. it was good food again at some under-rated chinese restaurant. had some good wines too cuz my uncle brought them along. i didnt even know that restaurant existed.

after dinner, took a cab down to club street to meet her for drinks again. only to find that the place was infested with a whole big bunch of irritating ppl. had a jug of vodka ribena and decided to scoot off to somewhere else. ended up at balaclava cuz she wanted to go there. they have a very sucky variety of beer, even worse than wala's! they dun even have kilkenny or hoe by bottle! ended up drinkin 3 pints of carlsberg until i felt like puking. i dun really enjoy carlsberg. and the bill came up to quite abit! *tsk* didnt stay for long cuz they close at like 1. shared a cab back with her then broke down in the cab... *sighs* i dunno at times i really pity her but like wad can i do? and i dun even know if i wanna do anything or not. my life is pretty ok the way it is. yes, my job may suck or be stressful but at least its a decent job and he feeds me well enough. i may be single but its better to be stuck in a relationship im not really happy with or know ultimately its not gonna head anywhere. i have a couple of chummies and pals that i can count on for company. wad more can i complain? we shld all learn to be contented with wad we have... its a tall task but if we can see things in sucha way, life wld be so much nicer....

im upset..

2007-08-30T23:55:00.000+08:00

it was a crappy day at work. TC is away on a sales trip again and she wun be back till 1 and a half wks later. its so torturous without her ard. i hate that ass and the hatred juz grows stronger as each day passes. he juz unknowingly started a war with me this morning. this is it! i think i've been as patient as i've ever been in my entire life, enough is enough.

i'll plot my strategies out and wage a war with him. like the chinese saying goes "bu shi ni si jiu shi wo wang!" --> which translates to "its either u die or i fail?"

im gonna pool all my contacts and resources together to make his life very difficult in time to come. ^&#$^$#%^$*(%^*(&*))$#$@$!

yet another day i gorged myself..

2007-08-29T23:19:00.001+08:00

i think i've been eatin too much recently. been spending way too much money on food and alcohol. and to think im supposed to be saving up to go for a loooong trip to US next year. i really wanna go so bad. im even prepared to go alone if i cant find anyone to accompany me!

today we didnt feel like having lunch at the canteen so we headed to bab noodles for lunch. i had kimchi chicken soup with rice because i've been having craving for kimchi soup for the past 2 days. finally fulfilled the craving but i felt that my normal myojo kimchi instant noodles+egg tasted better than the one at bab. maybe cuz they added spring onions and sesame seed in it.. my 2 most disliked ingredients in it thats y i didnt really enjoy it. and then we had extra side orders of tempura prawns and grilled gyoza to share.

went back to the office and today muz have been one of the days i received the most group leads from all over. my email was flooded with enquiries for quotations from all the various TAs and every now and then i had ppl plonking corp leads into my in-tray. it was so overwhelming.

decided to leave behind all the work to leave work on the dot.. becuz chummy #2 arranged for us to have dinner with aL and cbfsl! haha. we headed to gluttons bay for dinner. found a table effortlessly which was pretty surprising. and then we started to go ard ordering our food. i muz have walked like 10time to and fro from the table to the stalls becuz it was self-service and there were 2 princesses sitting at the table refusing to budge! tsk tsk... so we had chicken wings, oyster omelette, char kway teow, fried hokkien mee, stingray and kangkong... it was wayyyy too much food for the 4 of us. amazingly we finished almost everything cept for the chicken wings cuz we forgot cbfsl cant eat chicken! had a great time cuz cbfsl as usual made us laugh so hard with her weird antics that i thought i was gonna puke. ended up with hiccups which got cured eventually cuz chums gave the suggestion that i shld take 7 sips continuously but like 3 sips into it she told me i was sippin too slowly so i took 1 big gulp and they started laughing. i was trying so hard to control not to burst out laughin so that i cld swallow the darn gulp that the hiccups went away.

made our way to the taxi stand after having a few puffs by the waterfront. the taxi queue was so long and i juz saw the 106 bus coming by and suggested to chums to take the bus home. luckily i had an extra ez link card... i think it muz've been a long long while since she last took a bus. it wld've been more enjoyable if we weren't already too tired from all the laughin... lol. overall a good day with all my fun pals. =)

my first ENT at GP

2007-08-28T22:05:00.000+08:00

today i was unwillingly roped in for an ENT at GP with a group of japanese man from jalpak together with mr G, tc and mr pudge. in the beginning it was pretty awkward. didnt really know wad to say but the jap guy sitting next to me was pretty nice. he muz have realised i was feeling weird and started to talk crap with me. so while tc and mr g was talkin abt biz and current affairs that affected the tourism trade and hotel industry, there i was chattin abt nonsense with this jap guy. haha. while beats sitting there like an idiot... that was mr pudge.

so the food came... we conquered, some gave up the battle but the sole survivors amongst us was tc and 2 jap guys. it was wayyy too much food. i think next time tc suggests to go GP and tries to rope me in again i better stand by a very good excuse to get outta it. i almost cldn't stand up after that meal! felt so sick after that, like i needed a whole bottle of eno to help me push the food downwards inside me. nearer to the exit that is. haha

then came the time to bid our goodbyes.. and tc instructed me to go back to GP to sign the check. ehh y me?? typical example of me being sidekick.. well at least it was tc who instructed me and not the other powerless ass. the darn check came up to $630?! damn scary.. felt abit worried to sign it but i still went ahead to, like who cares it doesnt come out from my paycheck anyways. but thats like 1/3 of my salary man... and juz for lunch thats called pure insanity....